Space and pace

10/7/2015

We often think of coaching as creating a special space for a person to step back, often quite literally, from the pressures of day to day work and life to think about things differently. Indeed, the space we create between coach and coachee offers a great opportunity for change.

Yet space is a bit like elastic. Too much space and coaching can feel slack and lifeless, without definition or form. Too much pace and it can feel rushed, superficial and forced. Navigating space and pace is part of the, ‘How shall we do this?’ contract between coach and coachee.

The same question arises in leadership, training and facilitation. When to up the tempo, inject energy, move quickly. When to pause, breathe, process. It’s tricky in mixed groups. Activists want to get on with it. Suck it and see. Reflectors want space to observe it. Make sense of it.

So I try to remember: just enough space to allow for reflection; just enough pace to keep things moving. It’s always a judgement call. How much space and pace does this person or group need - in this situation, at this time? If in doubt, discuss it openly and ask for feedback.

22 Comments

Sarah Clark

9/7/2015 09:56:33 pm

I like to find out peoples learning styles at the start of the session, although these are fluid too. A balance of delivery that captures a range works well... My favourite moments are when a client takes charge of the flip chart pen! Lovely article nick .. Keep them coming!

Nick Wright

9/7/2015 10:04:03 pm

Hi Sarah,

Thanks for the affirmation! :)

How do you find out people's learning styles at the start? I agree that using a range of methods can work well, especially in a mixed group. It's sometimes a case of inviting people to suspend their preferences and to give new things a try...then afterwards, 'What did you discover?'

I often use physical methods aimed at bringing clients into closer contact with (and thereby increased awareness of) their own experience, worldview, defaults, preferences assumptions etc. - although with permission so that clients don't feel forced.

If you're interested in this too, you may find this case study article interesting based on Gestalt principles: http://www.nick-wright.com/just-do-it.html. With thanks again and best wishes.

Nick

9/7/2015 11:51:28 pm

Hi nick thanks will check that link out.
I ask people what their learning styles are usually people tend to know or they can do a VAK short learning style questionnaire.
If in a group setting I outline the tools I will use in the objectives and ask at the same time I ask if anyone is colour blind and when I do the domestics.

9/7/2015 11:57:53 pm

Hi Sarah. I haven't heard of VAK before. Is that similar to Honey & Mumford's learning styles? Since some people aren't familiar with the language of learning styles, I may as something like, 'What will enable you to get your best from this?' or 'How shall we do this?' It hadn't occurred to me to ask if anyone is colour blind. That's a good point - especially as I tend to use lots of different coloured pens on flipchart! With thanks again and best wishes. Nick

10/7/2015 01:35:08 am

Hi nick yes it is!
I think you need to go with how it feels in the room too. Some people green and red are difficult, some blue etc worth checking out. I ran for few weeks when in my early thirties before finding out a guy had bit seen any of my flips! Taught me something !
Sarah

19/7/2015 01:02:19 am

Just read your article on a gestalt case study really great. I use a great deal of this in my crim justice work and in training probation officers have used chair work where they practice moving me out of denial with Socratic questions.
Continuum s are great, use an anger one, a sexual respect one in my domestic violence work.
I am going to use gestalt work next week with my private client now.. Thanks for energising me with this!

19/7/2015 01:03:28 am

Excellent, Sarah - let us know how you get on! :) Nick

Julie Gouin

10/7/2015 08:10:23 pm

Nicely put.

10/7/2015 08:10:52 pm

Thanks Julia. :) Al the best. Nick

Eddie Lau

12/7/2015 01:52:26 am

Thanks Nick for sharing, very useful tips!
It is a good skill to learn as Leaders to balance Space and Pace. There is no "one size fits all" approach. Leaders have to, in case of group discussion/workshop etc, inject energy for the introverts and sometimes have to pause/hold back the extroverts, in order to balance out the participations from everybody. But without making the Introverts feel they are being pushed or the Extroverts being left out of their views.

12/7/2015 01:56:55 am

Hi Eddie and thanks for the note. Yes, being inclusive of different preferences and styles in a group is important - and can be difficult. It's one of the reasons why discussing with a group, 'How shall we do this?' or 'What way of doing this would work well for us?' can be helpful. If participants know in advance that these questions will be posed, it gives reflectors time to think beforehand. Alternatively, a group facilitator or leader can suggest something like, 'Let's pause for a moment and write down what would work well for us in this meeting' before discussing it as a group. As a friend of mine says, 'If you don't know what an introvert is thinking, it's because you haven't asked. If you don't know what an extrovert is thinking, it's because you haven't listened.' With best wishes. Nick

Jon Lee link

15/7/2015 06:13:19 pm

Approaching the coaching conversation in a mindful way, being fully present and able to notice any shifts in thoughts, feeling and sensations. If you can introduce mindfulness to your clients early, then in future conversations you could both begin with a mindful settling exercise so that you both come together with your barriers down and your senses open.

19/7/2015 01:07:42 am

Hi Jon and thanks for the note. Mindfulness can be a great way of arriving and seeking to be present in the here and now. I guess the space and pace question is both how to tune into and, at times, influence the focus and state of the client - and the dynamic between coach and client? With best wishes. Nick

Kim Ravida ACC CPC ELI-MP

19/7/2015 12:56:52 am

Thanks Nick for a great article with insight! I'm a high energy person so finding that balance was hard for me at first, once I understand that I needed to understand my client and how they processed, I was able to utilize the space and pace via my intuition. It hasn't failed me yet. Great article, I think that some coaches struggle with this.

19/7/2015 01:00:07 am

Hi Kim and thanks for the encouraging feedback. Yes, it can be quite an art form to find a way of matching our own energy with that of the client and, at times, mismatching it to evoke a different experience or response. Do you have any case examples you would be willing to share? With best wishes. Nick

Doaa K

22/7/2015 09:32:38 pm

Nice post Nick. Checkout this link too; it's got some awesome tips on how to juggle time versus space limitations:

1. Surefire Tools to Get things Done on Time:

http://www.trainersbox.net/time-management-presentation.html

Good Luck!

22/7/2015 09:33:55 pm

Thanks Doaa. With best wishes. Nick

Jo Geraghty

23/7/2015 08:53:17 pm

Interesting thoughts thanks. In this age of coaching and a move towards blended learning it is good to see the emphasis being placed on developing the person being coached rather than (as sadly still practiced by some) the focus being on training people to carry out tasks.

23/7/2015 08:56:04 pm

Hi Jo and thanks for the note. I guess coaching sits well with core principles in adult learning: e.g. doing with rather than doing to. It also sits well with humanistic values concerning development of people, albeit with tasks for which they hold responsibility or aspire to do as a backdrop. With best wishes. Nick

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30/7/2015 06:34:44 pm

It can be quite an art form to find a way of matching our own energy with that of the client and, at times, mismatching it to evoke a different experience or response. Do you have any case examples you would be willing to share? With best wishes. Nick

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9/8/2015 12:23:34 pm

Nice post, you really help me out my friend, thanks !

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9/8/2015 12:25:23 pm

First Nick got a great blog .I will be interested in more similar topics.

Space and pace

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