 ‘Without reflection, we go blindly on our way, creating more unintended consequences and failing to achieve anything useful.’ (Margaret J. Wheatley) Pause, breathe. Slow down to speed up. Make better decisions faster. It feels paradoxical. Take time out of the quick fire, the cut and thrust norms of work. ‘I don’t have time’, you might say, ‘I’m too busy.’ True. Unless it's an emergency: if you’re ‘too busy’, you are too busy. Crisis mode is fit for crises. Like driving over the red line, it’s unsustainable for prolonged periods. Risks and consequences: impaired thinking, delayed responses, poor decision-making, stress, burnout, crash. Is there a solution..? Coaching and action learning enter the stage. What’s that about? Optimal space for optimal pace. Like taking energy drinks while running, like refuelling in mid-flight. Take a moment, an impactful question, a critical reflection: dust settles and you see more clearly. You think more deeply and more broadly. You notice who and what you’re not-noticing. You enhance your resilience and your resourcefulness. You grow in insight. You fulfil your potential. You achieve your goals. Curious to discover how I can help you? Get in touch!
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 ‘The difference between a stumbling block and a stepping stone is not in the event itself but in how you think about it and what you do after it.’ (Michael Josephson) I was coaching an inspiring business entrepreneur in Southeast Asia last week. She’s avidly developing a social enterprise to benefit the poorest people in her local community by providing them with affordable nutritious food and invaluable employment opportunities. I’m impressed by her compassion for those who are vulnerable and her vision to bring hope. She’s a follower of Jesus and sees this as her distinctive calling. It’s not an easy environment in which to make headway and there are lots of barriers on route. Three months into this venture, she’s reached a point where the question that now faces her is how to scale-up to reach and benefit more people. It’s a tricky challenge to navigate. We looked at different options with their relative pros and cons alongside them. The dilemma lays in how to generate sufficient resources to create the investments needed to make the leap, along with the associated financial risks if things don’t work out as planned. And that with very little to fall back on apart from her faith in God. She settled on the idea of a stepping stone: a fridge-freezer that would enable her to save unsold stock and broaden the range of items available. Having bought it, however, an envious neighbour immediately and anonymously notified the health department that she was cooking in her own home. Officials visited the very next day and insisted she make expensive changes to her kitchen before she may continue. The stepping stone became a stumbling block. So now – how turn a setback into a step forward..? The test here is less one of situational circumstances per se and more one of resourcefulness and resilience. I’m reminded of Michael Jordan’s words, ‘Obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, dig under it, go through it or work around it.’ This young woman studied psychology, has fire in her spirit and won’t give up easily. She prays hard, thinks creatively and is absolutely determined to find or innovate a way through this. She will succeed.  ‘Leadership is influence.’ (John C. Maxwell) It’s one thing to have insight. It’s another thing to exert influence on the basis of that insight. This is often a dilemma for leaders and professionals when seeking to influence change across dynamic, complex systems and relationships. After all, what if I can see something important, something that could make a significant difference, yet I can’t gain access to key decision-makers? Or what if, even if I can get access, they’re not willing to listen? What if people are so preoccupied by other issues that my message is drowned out by louder voices and I can’t achieve cut-through? Early in my career, I worked as OD lead in an international non-governmental organisation that was about to embark on radical change. I’d studied OD at university on a masters’ degree course and, based on that experience, could foresee critical risks in what the leadership was planning to do. I tried hard to get access to raise the red flags but, by the time I met with the leaders, it was too late. They had already fired the starting gun on their chosen programme. My concerns turned out to be well-founded, and the changes almost wrecked the organisation. I agonised for some time over why I’d been so ineffective at influencing their decisions. I learned some valuable lessons. Firstly, the view I held of my role – the contribution I could bring – was different to that of the leaders. I viewed myself as consultant whereas they viewed me as service provider. Secondly, the leaders had become so emotionally-invested in the change they had designed that they reacted defensively if challenged. They saw my well-meaning red flags as resistance rather than as a genuine desire to help. I would need to change my approach. Since then, I have practised building human-professional relationships with leaders and other stakeholders from the earliest opportunity. These relationships are built on two critical factors: firstly, respect for e.g. the studies, training, expertise and lived experience they bring to the table; and, secondly, empathy for e.g. the responsibilities, hopes, demands and expectations they face – both inside and outside of work. Against this backdrop, I’m able to pray, share my own insights and, where needed, advocate a change from an intention and base of support.  ‘True leadership stems from individuality that is honestly and sometimes imperfectly expressed. Leaders should strive for authenticity over perfection.’ (Sheryl Sandberg) An Indian colleague, Veena, spoke with me this week about her approach to life and relationships: ‘Always remember that light travels faster than sound’. First impressions can make lasting impressions. People will make instinctive and intuitive judgements based on what they perceive, encounter and experience in us: before they hear the words we speak. If our words are consistent with our conduct and behaviour, it will build trust. If inconsistent, if they somehow don’t ring true, they will smack of inauthenticity or, worse, hypocrisy. Actions often speak louder than words. It’s a serious caution to avoid a façade and a deep call to model congruence and integrity. This theme often arises when I’m coaching or training leaders and managers in leading and influencing change. They often feel as if they need to put on a front, a brave face, to act the part of a clear and confident leader if they are to establish credibility in role. They may believe they need to act, too, as if they have the answer to every question, to avoid being exposed as not-knowing or incompetent. They may want to present a Henry V persona, a strong and courageous leader, to inspire strength and confidence in others in the midst of complexity, uncertainty and change. They may seek coaching, mentoring or training to hide and mask their own anxieties well. This presents a dilemma. On the one hand, there are times (such as crises) in which leaders need to present themselves as visionary and confident: ‘We will get through this.’ This kind of stance and conviction can have a significant influence on the psychological and emotional state and decisions of those they hope will engage and follow. If, however, it sounds hollow or inappropriate to the situation at hand, it’s likely to have the opposite effect. In view of this, I prepare myself, not just my words, so that what I speak is (I hope) genuine, real and true. I do this by creating a breathing space to focus on prayer, presence and participation before I step into the room. How do you do it? |
Nick WrightI'm a psychological coach, trainer and OD consultant. Curious to discover how can I help you? Get in touch! 
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