You knew it all

Wright, N. (2004) ‘You Knew it All’, News, Christians in Caring Professions, May, Issue 212, pp2-3.

It has been said that Christians in health and social care work are in continual danger of debilitating stress owing to (a) allegiance to a global mission beyond our human ability to fulfil and (b) adherence to lofty values beyond our human ability to maintain.  Sadly, these factors lead some Christians into feelings of failure, depression and burnout.  A spiritual vaccine against such plagues of self-doubt is to remind ourselves continually of God’s providential love and grace demonstrated in Christ. 

God is never disillusioned with those whom he calls into his service precisely because he never had any illusions in the first place.  The Bible explains it is while we were still sinners that Christ died for us.  God takes us as we are and works through our strengths and weaknesses to achieve his eternal purposes.  We sometimes become disillusioned with ourselves, however, and lose hope that we can ever fulfil God’s calling.  I wrote the following words as a song of meditation after a particularly bad fall and resulting time of misery and remorse in my own life:

You knew that I’d fail you from the day that you chose me.  You knew it all right from the start.  You had no illusions.  You saw the depths of my heart yet you didn’t cast me away.  And I know you can make me, and I know you can take me, turn me around into someone new. And I feel so amazed, as I stand before your throne looking into your eyes.  When I deserve to die – but see you standing in my place.  And I know the wounds that you bore should have been mine.  But I know you can make me, and I know you can take me, turn me around into someone new.

‘If you fall, make sure you land on your knees’.  This wise advice was given to me by a friend when I became a new Christian.  On reflection, it could have been extended to, ‘…and if you fail in your own eyes, remember that the God who calls you will carry you too.’  God is sovereign and his strength is made perfect in our weakness.