Different

2/10/2018

‘Who or what features in your holiday photos?’ (Richard Marshall)

I find the question intriguing. Richard is a psychologist who has lived and worked in different parts of the world. He observed that some people notice, focus on and value that which is the same as their ‘normal’; others that which is different. I’m definitely a difference person. I like and get a buzz from diversity – not in its politically-correct sense – simply from different-ness. Since earliest childhood, I have felt drawn to people, things, places and ways of seeing and doing things that are radically different to the norm, my norm. It has shaped profoundly my life, career, relationships and choices.

At school, I looked out for kids who were from different countries and spoke different languages. Unsurprisingly my own best subjects at school were languages too. Later, as my friends settled down in life, I hitch-hiked around Europe, loved the different cultures, currencies – and lamented when the Euro brought boring…sameness. I dreamed of marrying an exotic girl. I spent much of my adult life working in international NGOs, fascinated by so many new environments, cultures and people. I have studied and worked in 4 different professional fields: community work, TEFL, coaching and OD.

So, here’s the thing: how often have you heard the maxim, ‘People don’t like change’ or, ‘People are resistant to change’? A large swathe of change management literature is devoted to the theme. Yet is it really true? People may well resist change that is and feels imposed on them – in which case the resistance may be a response to a lack of choice, a loss of control, rather than to a change per se. As leaders, OD, coaches and trainers, how well do we notice and capitalise on the insight and energy of those who instinctively prefer creativity and innovation, difference and change? What do you do?

46 Comments

Vicky Ross

3/10/2018 09:56:53 am

Really interesting and thought provoking article Nick, thanks for sharing!

Nick Wright

3/10/2018 09:57:31 am

Thanks for your encouraging feedback, Vicky!

Aleah Russell

3/10/2018 09:58:29 am

It has taken me years to realize how different I am after being told repeatedly. I used to think I was just like everyone else. Now, I know I'm not, and I recognize how special that is.

3/10/2018 10:00:13 am

Hi Aleah. I'm intrigued. In what ways or situations have you noticed you are different?

3/10/2018 05:03:03 pm

For one thing, I love change. It is exciting for me. When I am not growing and learning, I tend to get bored. I never tire of learning new things, and my interests are vast. I was told as a youngster that I was good at a lot of things, but needed to find one thing and stick with it. How can I possibly do that when I'm interested in EVERYTHING? I can focus on one thing more than others, but I don't ever want to stop learning about other things as well.

3/10/2018 05:04:43 pm

Hi Aleah. I love that: 'How can I possibly do that when I'm interested in EVERYTHING?' I too have a similar character trait. :)

Mary Jo Burchard, Ph.D.

3/10/2018 10:01:22 am

Yes.... Winning the lottery or marrying our soul mate are changes just as major as losing a job or death of a loved one....the nature of each change matters, just like the magnitude matters, so it isn't fair to generalize how we respond to [all] change. Perhaps more effective questions are: what causes us to feel threatened when we encounter each change, and what (if anything) are we afraid of losing?

3/10/2018 10:05:57 am

Thanks Mary. Another useful question can be, 'What does the change - or the way in which it is being introduced or managed - represent for X?' The same changes may represent different things for different people, or the same people at different times. It's often what the change represents for a person or group that influences the emotional and behavioural response rather than the change itself per se.

Ian Henderson

3/10/2018 10:06:45 am

I like the reference to your change preference Nick. I'm also reminded of the maxim that you can change but not grow, but it's hard to grow and not change.

3/10/2018 10:08:25 am

Thanks Ian. That's an interesting link between change and growth. Is it possible to grow without changing?

Martine Bolton

3/10/2018 10:09:27 am

Hi Nick - I love the change that I choose for myself, and dislike it when things become too samey and comfortable. However, I tend to dislike change that's imposed upon me - especially when that change is tied up with loss somehow.

At school I think I felt a bit different to the crowd (we moved around quite a lot), and similarly gravitated to other kids who seemed a bit different too 😊.

3/10/2018 10:10:46 am

Hi Martine. 'I love the change that I choose for myself, and dislike it when things become too samey and comfortable. However, I tend to dislike change that's imposed upon me - especially when that change is tied up with loss somehow.' We sound very similar on that front! :)

3/10/2018 05:29:36 pm

I wonder if it's universal 🤔!

3/10/2018 05:31:47 pm

Hi Martine. 'Imposed' - I imagine so, yes. 'Comfortable' - probably not..!

3/10/2018 06:31:12 pm

Ah, yes! I think you're right 😊

Dr. Carrie Gilligan, Ph.D.

3/10/2018 10:12:36 am

I agree- I have observed that it is a lack of participatory autonomy that breeds resistance, not, perhaps, the change itself. I find that framing change in a learning context can be a successful strategy.

3/10/2018 10:13:55 am

Thanks Carrie. Can you say a bit more about, 'framing change in a learning context can be a successful strategy'? Do you have an example you could share?

3/10/2018 05:32:52 pm

Indeed, in learning we set objectives for learning activities; we take reasonable steps toward those learning activities- an example is the organization that uses change mgmt. in incremental steps.

3/10/2018 05:35:36 pm

Thanks Carrie. I guess the success...or otherwise...still depends to a degree on felt and experienced 'participatory autonomy'?

3/10/2018 06:02:39 pm

Indeed- “buy-in” is essential.

3/10/2018 09:06:22 pm

I do agree, that when we initiate change we must give followership an active, participatory role in the process. It can be organic if we approach it this way, rather than sweeping changes from the top down or worse, outside entities, that give no rationale for the change.

3/10/2018 09:11:25 pm

Thanks Carrie. My sense is that leadership and followership are dynamics that flow between people (irrespective of hierarchy), out of which energy and creativity can emerge. In that sense, it's less about roles and more about relationships. What do you think?

4/10/2018 11:10:00 am

Unfortunately there are so many systems that are top down. Those organizations and cultures do not always value the importance of professional relationship as some organizations do. I have not looked for our conversation here-but the peer-reviewed literature/research may clarify top down mechanisms and change management variables.

4/10/2018 11:12:58 am

Yes, I agree. I think that's where ideas and approaches including dispersed leadership, distributed leadership and co-active leadership can challenge conventional top-down cultural assumptions and norms.

Adrian Spurrell

3/10/2018 10:14:41 am

Check out the stuff on Immunity to Change - its great. Starts with the idea that people AREN'T resistant to change, they just want something else.

3/10/2018 10:16:11 am

Hi Adrian. I like the way you framed that: 'People aren't resistant to change, they just want something else.' On Immunity to Change, you may find this related piece interesting? http://www.nick-wright.com/blog/immunity-to-change

Gopal Sharma MBA MSP

3/10/2018 03:12:59 pm

My emphasis in organisational or IT enabled organisational change is to Explain the Change - before & after, so that people can make an informed choice. People also have different preferences in receiving and absorbing communication on change. And some will form immediate reaction some will ponder. Leadership is about to understand and recognise the natural human instincts to ensure change lands properly, is absorbed properly and realised effectively. It is hard work to deliver benefits of change and it cant be done through only PowerPoint or Consultants. Leaders play very important role to ensure change is realised with right involvement.

3/10/2018 03:14:44 pm

Hi Gopal. I agree about preferences and the significant role of leadership. You may find this related short piece interesting? http://www.nick-wright.com/blog/personal-preference-and-change

David Head

3/10/2018 05:05:53 pm

I agree that it is a misconception that people fear change per se. They may resist it if they perceive that it may be change for change sake, detrimental to their interests or if they are of a fixed mindset. If they perceive that it makes things better for the organisation, themselves and/or their team they are most likely to embrace it. So they key lies in leadership and communication. Driving alignment is a business critical skill and requires leaders to win hearts and minds. Only when people are intellectually and emotionally engaged will they allow change to happen, or drive it themselves. And yes, they are more likely to fear and therefore resist change if it is being forced on them.

3/10/2018 05:08:59 pm

Thanks David. We could look at it differently, e.g. 'Eliciting and/or discovering alignment is a business critical skill' and 'Requires leaders being willing to have their own hearts and minds won over'. What do you think?

3/10/2018 06:08:18 pm

Yes Nick, if the leader is not sufficiently engaged, or lacks the skills to win others over, change programmes generally fail. I have lost count of how many ERP programmes go that way for example..

3/10/2018 06:18:48 pm

Hi David. I guess a question it raises for me is how we conceive of and understand 'leadership'. If we imagine (as I do) leadership as a dynamic, an influence, that arises in the context of a relationship, it's quite different to the notion of leadership in its hierarchical role-related sense. Leadership could be exercised, initiated and experienced by anyone anywhere inside or outside of an organisation and, in my view, it's an important role of formal 'leaders' to look out for, be open to and work with that dynamic wherever they see it emerging. Does that make any sense? You may find this short related piece interesting? http://www.nick-wright.com/blog/leadership-as-transformational-dynamic

4/10/2018 11:05:29 am

Interesting thoughts and article, thank you Nick. I am also interested in the unsung hero’s not necessarily in ‘leadership’ roles, who exhibit leadership in all of their words and deeds and set a fine example to all of us, by doing the right things even when nobody else is in the room. This is one definition of integrity I believe. Yes, we are all intimately connected through invisible threads and everything we do or say has an impact on others.

4/10/2018 11:08:51 am

Thanks David. That makes me think of leadership qualities such as initiative, influence and integrity...to which we could also add intimacy, invisibility and impact. Lots to reflect on!

Kathrin

4/10/2018 07:16:45 pm

Kinder/Jugendliche wollen sich voneinander unterscheiden. Sie entwickeln und verändern ihren eigenen Stil, ihre Denkweise und ihr Verhalten. Es ist interessant, ihre Veränderungen mitzuerleben. Doch die große Frage für einen Lehrer ist: Am Ende eines Jahres sollten alle Schüler ihr Examen schaffen. Doch die Schüler haben in all ihrer Vielfalt und Kreativität unterschiedliche Voraussetzungen und Intentionen. Muss ich als Lehrer akzeptieren, dass sie das Examen nicht bestehen, sie dabei aber in ihrer Kreativität und Einzigartigkeit unterstützen? Oder soll ich in dieser Zeit ihre Kreativität, ihren Wunsch, anders zu sein und ihre Unlust ignorieren und sie mit einheitlichem Lernen bis zum Examen bringen?

5/10/2018 01:37:00 pm

Hi Kathrin. I think that's an interesting tension between difference and uniformity. How do we allow, encourage and support individual identity, authenticity and expression whilst, at the same time, channel students to achieve standards and goals within parameters that are pre-set by politicians, education authorities and examiners? I am curious: as a teacher, how do you do it?

[Hallo Kathrin. Ich denke, das ist eine interessante Spannung zwischen Differenz und Einheitlichkeit. Wie ermöglichen, fördern und unterstützen wir individuelle Identität, Authentizität und Ausdruck, während wir den Studierenden gleichzeitig ermöglichen, Standards und Ziele zu erreichen, deren Parameter von Politikern, Bildungsbehörden und Prüfern vorgegeben werden? Ich bin neugierig: als Lehrer, wie machst du das?]

Clifford Morgan

5/10/2018 01:21:03 pm

Short, simple yet very thought provoking Nick. I agree that most people don’t fear change itself and do actually enjoy new and novel. Is this true of people? Are there people who inherently fear/dislike change of all kind or anything new? I’m interested to know your thoughts?

5/10/2018 01:31:02 pm

Thanks Clifford. I know and have worked with people who have a strong preference for consistency and continuity over change. Sometimes, it's less of a resistance to change per se and more of a contentment with same-ness. It means they are more likely to feel settled with where they live, with the work they do, with relationships they establish etc. They don't appear to have the same felt need for difference and change that I have in order to feel alive and fulfilled.

Jacqui Power

6/10/2018 06:46:45 pm

I’m learning to embrace change, change isn’t always easy but learning to change is a lifelong journey.

6/10/2018 06:47:40 pm

Hi Jacqui. Yes, it's difficult to conceive of a journey without change.

K.V. Simon

8/10/2018 11:21:29 am

We must learn to value variety.

8/10/2018 11:21:51 am

Hi K.V. Can you say more?

Ekaterina Zizevskaia

7/11/2018 02:37:50 pm

I suppose some people like changes and exploration of everything new but they can have some obstacles as well. So their energy can be blocked as well sometimes.

7/11/2018 02:38:36 pm

Hi Ekaterina. Do you have any examples from experience you could share here?

9/11/2018 11:05:49 am

Hi Nick! Yes, I can. I like changes myself and I moved to China to live for a while being 21, I changed my carrier path and took another university degree etc.. But I used to have some problems with starting my counseling practice for couple of years. I explained it to myself that I was too busy to start it. But now I understand I used to have a lot of anxiety connected with it.

9/11/2018 11:07:34 am

Thanks, Ekaterina, for sharing such an honest and useful insight from personal experience.

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