NICK WRIGHT
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
  • Testimonials
  • Articles
    • Organisations and leadership
    • Learning and development
    • Coaching and counselling
  • Blog
  • e-Resources
  • News
  • Contact
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
  • Testimonials
  • Articles
    • Organisations and leadership
    • Learning and development
    • Coaching and counselling
  • Blog
  • e-Resources
  • News
  • Contact

False alarm

9/12/2021

24 Comments

 
Picture

​A ‘check engine’ warning light flashed up on my car dashboard this week. It turned out to be a false alarm – a warning that was, apparently, triggered by jump start last week. I know that now. The unnerving part was the not-knowing in-between. What is there was something seriously wrong? How am I to know if a warning symbol can be ignored or if it’s highlighting a genuine cause for concern? In this case, I was able to take the car to a local mechanic to have it checked out.

When, however, we experience ‘warning lights’ psychologically or emotionally, it can be harder to discern. A manager is invited to present to an Executive Team and feels deeply anxious. Is that a false alarm or, perhaps, an intuition that is flagging up what ought to be considered a genuine risk? A team member is asked to give critical feedback to a colleague in another department and feels worried about how they may react. Are they being over-sensitive or should they be concerned?

Here are some insights to help when making a judgement call. 1. Has the person experienced similar situations and associated emotions in the past? If so, their past may be re-triggering feelings in the present. 2. Does the person have any tangible evidence that supports their concerns? They may be making hypotheses or assumptions. 3. Would different others be likely to feel the same if faced with a similar situation? It may be a personal or cultural narrative the person is telling themself.
​
A tricky part is that it’s not always an either-or phenomenon. The anxious manager may have experienced something similar in the past and the Executive Team may be demanding unrealistic levels of performance. The team member may be highly-sensitive and their colleague may react defensively. How do you distinguish between a false alarm and something that’s real? Do you trust your your feelings or intuition most, or lean more towards evidence or reason – or something else?
24 Comments
Michael Parise, MDiv, MA, CSD
9/12/2021 06:18:44 pm

Excellent article Nick! It’s that fight-freeze-flee response in yet another form. And when there may not be anyone trustworthy or knowledgeable to consult immediately what does one do? I try to recall similar experiences from the past as a starting point to offer me some degree of familiarity to the present situation. That’s my starting point to calm me. Yet I must admit that if it’s an entirely new experience, I do feel the panic rising and my rational brain shutting down. I look forward to responses here!

Reply
Nick Wright
9/12/2021 08:40:32 pm

Thank you, Michael - and for such an honest response! Yes, one of the activities I use in change leadership and resilience workshops is to invite participants to tell stories to one-another of situations in the past that felt very difficult at the time, yet worked out well in the end. Even if the new situation itself is very different, it enables them to connect with feelings from the past that resonate in the present, and to create a greater sense of calmness, confidence and hope.

Reply
Michael Parise, MDiv, MA, CSD
9/12/2021 09:17:48 pm

Nick, excellent approach. Nice hearing from another empath!

Nick Wright
9/12/2021 09:23:24 pm

Thanks Michael. I'm not sure how naturally empathetic I am. As a follower of Jesus, I try to tune in deeply to people's lived experiences in order to offer love and hope. In other words, I think it's a good and right thing to do. As one of my team colleagues posted on the back of my chair after a Myers Briggs Type Indicator workshop, "I think, therefore I feel." :)

John (Norval) Settle
9/12/2021 06:19:31 pm

This gets into the realm of limits on reason and the effect of "cognitive biases" of which there are many (including confirmation bias, sunk-costs bias, implicit bias, egocentric bias, affinity/stereotype bias, etc). Some of these are of long-standing origin, "designed" by nature as survival devices -- but also able to affect our reason and skew how we interpret "evidence"!
Humans are not as "logical" as we might like to think: Suggest reading "The Enigma of Reason," by Mercier & Sperber.
We should value our good judgment - including our intuition, which consists of much unconscious learning life gives us -- as long as we temper our reliance with conscious awareness of its limits!

Reply
Nick Wright
9/12/2021 08:49:35 pm

Hi John. Yes, on cognitive biases, this short related piece may be of interest? Art of deception: https://www.nick-wright.com/art-of-deception.html

I haven't read Mercier and Sperber's book but I've had a glance and it looks like it may have some resonances with McRaney's 'You are not so smart'.

Reply
Elena Perella
9/12/2021 06:20:19 pm

Intuition most.

It helps to make the right choice, always, if you are ready ready to hear it and follow it, of course.

Reply
Nick Wright
9/12/2021 08:33:04 pm

Hi Elena. You reminded me of some research by Eugene Sadler-Smith. He found that leaders often make critical decisions intuitively, then post-rationalise them to justify the decision if working in cultures dominated by 'rationality'.

Reply
Elena Perella
11/12/2021 09:00:19 am

Nick, interesting research.

It does not surprise me because intuition is the best "tool" we can use to guide us in making decisions.

Problems arises when there are feelings that interfere with our intuition.

Fabiana Pérez
9/12/2021 08:34:12 pm

I agree Elena, intuition is the most important thing, specially when you know yourself, when you are connected with your inner self.

Reply
Nick Wright
9/12/2021 08:55:16 pm

Hi Fabiana. I'm not sure - and I'm curious. If intuition is something like tacit knowledge, based on a subconsciously-distilled lifetime of experience, is it possible that our 'intuition' could at times be mistaken just as our 'reasoning' could be too? Perhaps we need a balance of intuition and reason - each sense-checking the other? What do you think?

Nick Wright
11/12/2021 09:05:10 am

Thanks Elena. I really liked your comment: 'Problems arise when there are feelings that interfere with our intuition.' It's a tricky one. Intuition is, in a sense, a 'felt experience' - yet not necessarily an emotional experience. How to discern the difference..?

You may find this short related piece - and the discussion that followed - interesting on this theme? https://www.nick-wright.com/blog/intuition

Reply
Elena Perella
11/12/2021 06:22:55 pm

Thank you for sharing your article, Nick. I understand your point of view. Great discussion, btw.

I'll share my insight.

Rationality gives shape to what your intuition is telling you.

Let's say, your intuition tells you not to take the road to the left. That feeling is sent to the mind that rationalizes it by creating the thought "I'll take the road to the right". This thought leads your body to make your hands turn the steering wheel to the right. And so you saved your life because a few minutes later an accident on the left road happened.

Our family’s toxic emotional inheritance and societal toxic conditionings silence our intuition and mislead us when we have to make choices. This is why, if our intuition says loud and clear that we should go left, we go right; or that we shouldn’t get involved in a romantic relationship with a particular person and we still do it. Or we don’t hear any warning at all. Our intuition is blocked by a toxic conviction or a thought, or maybe an emotion that prevents us from being fully aligned with it, often forcing us to make unhealthy choices.

Perhaps you'd like to read a blog I wrote:
https://www.sentidu.com/how-to-use-your-intuition-to-make-more-effective-choices-and-decisions/

Nick Wright
11/12/2021 09:25:11 pm

Thanks Elena. Wow - so much food for thought! The illustration you shared of turning right on the road, and thereby avoiding an accident that happened later on the road to the left, sounds more to me like a kind of 'spiritual' discernment, rather than intuition per se? Interesting.

Thank you for sharing the link to the blog too. It sounds like you have identified the risk of contamination by introjection etc. from prior relationships that we could regard as toxic. The challenge then is to clear away the voices of others in order to hear more clearly the voice of intuition.

Elena Perella
13/12/2021 10:28:07 am

You're welcome, Nick!

I am curious about what you say. What is it, according to you, the difference between "spiritual discernment" and "intuition"?

You're welcome. Our family's toxic emotional inheritance is the cause of almost all our problems. Eliminate it and you solve them permanently. Most of all you spare your children and future generations unnecessary suffering.

Nick Wright
13/12/2021 10:33:17 am

Hi Elena. I see intuition as, essentially, tacit (subconscious) knowledge, based on a lifetime of experience. It often surfaces, and is experienced, physically rather than rationally - e.g. a 'hunch' or 'gut feeling'.

In the illustration you shared, no amount of lifetime experience could alert me to an accident that hasn't yet happened...unless, of course, I know something about the risks associated with that particular route.

That made me wonder about a different kind of 'knowing', and where that may originate. As a follower of Jesus, I would associate it with 'spiritual' discernment. That is, a knowing beyond ourselves.

Ella Hydes
9/12/2021 08:58:59 pm

False alarms exist in many different areas. If it's about my health or technology, I should have everything clarified. But at work, if I don't feel good in the morning, if I have doubts about my preparation or if I don't feel like going to work, then I shouldn't let these "false alarm feelings" win, but try to make the most of the day or the meeting .

Reply
Nick Wright
9/12/2021 09:11:26 pm

Hi Ella. It sounds like you are differentiating between those things that can be fact-checked, or perhaps known empirically with certainty, and those psychological experiences that are necessarily more subjective in nature.

The former can be tested with reason and evidence. The latter can be explored phenomenologically as lived-experience in the world, to see what possible alternative perspectives, meanings and feelings may emerge.



Reply
E.G. (Ervin) Sebastian - CPC, CSL
10/12/2021 10:10:18 pm

That's a tough one, Nick. You know I'm a ninja and I stay calm in the hottest situations... but that also means when there are gun shuts around me (which happened in the past, except it turned out they were not gun shuts); while others will duck and panic, I'll stand calm... which also means I could be shot... later I think, "Dang! I should have ducked" 🦁

Hmm... "Intuition" - I think intuition is at the same level as Santa Claus. I'm still unclear what the heck is it (though, I got interviewed on how intuition guides me at an intuition summit). Yes, there's a chance that intuition guides me, but I do NOT know that... I just do. Like Yoda said: "There's no try, just do or don't"; but is it intuition that guides me, or my brain decides based on past experience OR based on the thought that "wow, this could be exciting, interesting, etc."?

Reply
Nick Wright
10/12/2021 10:18:07 pm

Hi E.G. I always find your insights and experiences so profound, entertaining and intriguing! I love that your comment, 'Yes, there's a chance that intuition guides me, but I do not know that...I just do.'

It reminds me of Jasmin in the Philippines (whom I've just blogged about today). When I ask her what philosophy or ideology guides her actions, she often looks at me blankly. 'I saw a need...and I responded.'

(https://www.nick-wright.com/blog/advent)

Reply
E.G. (Ervin) Sebastian - CPC, CSL
11/12/2021 09:06:42 am

Nick, LOVE IT! (Jasmin's response)

and... after letting it simmer, I know what guides me: GOD.
Oh, crop! I misspelled it! I meant, ADD (or supposedly HDHD - I got diagnosed this year... finally). People like me, we don't think - we do. Is that based on intuition? No idea. Just like Jasmin, we just take action (accept, yes, many many HDHD people get lost, are scattered, are emotionally unbalanced... but it's actually like nuclear power - once you harness it, it can take you further than anything... Through, meditation, auto-hypnosis / auto-suggestion, and lots of mindfulness and other personal development training, I went from a straight F student to a straight A student in college (and last years of my high school) - got multiple awards in college, some really prestigious ones.

But, yes... some call it intuition, I call it HDHD behavior :) I don't need to think and analyze - I see it, I believe in it, I do it.

Nick Wright
11/12/2021 09:11:26 am

Thanks E.G. I love the way in which you are able to share from personal experience in such an inspiring and energising way! Quick question - is HDHD the same, or similar, to what is known as ADHD in the UK, or something different altogether?

(...and, on the God question...you may have been right the first time!) :)

E.G. (Ervin) Sebastian - CPC, CSL
11/12/2021 09:29:45 pm

Nick, ehmmm... it is ADHD 🐒
It was just a typo 😺

Nick Wright
11/12/2021 09:30:59 pm

Hi E.G. OK - that makes sense! :)




Leave a Reply.

    ​Nick Wright

    ​I'm a psychological coach, trainer and OD consultant. Curious to discover how can I help you? ​Get in touch!

    Picture
    Like what you read? Simply enter your email address below to receive regular blog updates!
    Subscribe to Blog
    Picture
    Picture


    ​Archives

    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012
    February 2012
    January 2012
    December 2011
    November 2011
    October 2011
    September 2011
    August 2011
    July 2011
    June 2011
    May 2011
    April 2011
    March 2011
    February 2011

    Categories

    All
    Abc
    Ability
    Accountability
    Achievement
    Act
    Action
    Action Learning
    Activism
    Adaptability
    Adaptive
    Advent
    Adventure
    Africa
    Agency
    Agile
    Ambiguity
    Angle
    Anticipation
    Anxiety
    Appraisal
    Appreciation
    Appreciative
    Appreciative Inquiry
    Approach
    Argyris
    Asia
    Assumption
    Assumptions
    Asylum
    Attachment
    Attention
    Attitude
    Audience
    Authenticity
    Authority
    Autonomy
    Avoidance
    Awareness
    Behaviour
    Being
    Belief
    Beliefs
    Bias
    Bible
    Body Language
    Boundaries
    Brainstorming
    Brand
    Calling
    Care
    Career
    Censorship
    Challenge
    Change
    Character
    Charity
    Child
    Choice
    Choose
    Christ
    Christian
    Christmas
    Clarity
    Client
    Climate
    Coach
    Coaching
    Coactive
    Cognition
    Cognitive
    Cognitive Behavioural
    Commitment
    Communication
    Community
    Compassion
    Competence
    Competencies
    Complexity
    Concepts
    Confidence
    Conflict
    Confluence
    Congruence
    Consciousness
    Construct
    Constructs
    Construe
    Consultancy
    Contact
    Content
    Context
    Contracting
    Contribution
    Control
    Conversation
    Corruption
    Counselling
    Counterintiution
    Counterintuition
    Countertransference
    Courage
    Craziness
    Creativity
    Credibility
    Crisis
    Critical Consciousness
    Critical Reflection
    Critical Reflective Practice
    Critical Reflexivity
    Critical Thinking
    Critique
    Cross
    Cross Culture
    Cross-culture
    Culture
    Curiosity
    Customer Care
    Customers
    Customer Service
    Death
    Deception
    Decision
    Deconstruction
    Defence
    Defences
    Deferred Gratification
    Definition
    Delusion
    Democracy
    Depression
    Determination
    Development
    Deviance
    Deviant
    Diagnosis
    Disaster
    Discernment
    Disclosure
    Discovery
    Discrimination
    Disruptive
    Dissent
    Dissident
    Dissonance
    Distinctiveness
    Distortion
    Diversity
    Dream
    Dynamic
    Dynamics
    Easter
    Ecology
    Edge
    Edi
    Education
    Effectiveness
    Efficiency
    Ego State
    Eliciting
    Emergence
    Emotion
    Emotional
    Emotional Intelligence
    Empathy
    Empowerment
    Encouragement
    Energy
    Engagement
    Environment
    Equality
    Eternity
    Ethics
    Ethiopia
    Evaluation
    Evidence
    Evocative
    Existential
    Existentialism
    Expectation
    Expectations
    Experience
    Experiment
    Experimentation
    Exploration
    Explore
    Exposure
    Facilitation
    Faith
    Fear
    Feedback
    Feeling
    Feminism
    Figure
    Filter
    Fit
    Flashback
    Focus
    Forgiveness
    Framework
    Freedom
    Freud
    Fun
    Future
    Gender
    Geopolitical
    Geopolitics
    Gestalt
    Global
    Goal
    Goals
    God
    Gospel
    Grace
    Grief
    Grit
    Ground
    Group
    Guidance
    Healing
    Health
    Hear
    Heidegger
    Hero
    Hope
    Human
    Human Givens
    Humanity
    Human Resources
    Human Rights
    Humility
    Humour
    Hybrid
    Hypotheses
    Hypothesis
    Icon
    Ideation
    Identity
    Image
    Imagination
    Impact
    Impostor
    Inclusion
    Independence
    Influence
    INGO
    Initiative
    Injustice
    Innovation
    Inquiry
    Insecurity
    Insight
    Inspiration
    Instinct
    Integrity
    Intention
    Interdependence
    Interference
    International
    Interpretation
    Intimacy
    Introversion
    Intuition
    Invisible
    Jargon
    Jesus
    Journey
    Jungle
    Justice
    Keys
    Knowing
    Knowledge
    Labels
    Language
    Lateral Thinking
    Leader
    Leadership
    Learner
    Learning
    Lesson
    Liberal
    Life
    Light
    Listening
    Logic
    Loss
    Love
    Management
    Manager
    Marathon
    Matrix
    Mbti
    Meaning
    Media
    Mediation
    Meetings
    Memory
    Mentoring
    Merit
    Metaphor
    Metaphysic
    Mindfulness
    Miracle
    Mirroring
    Misfit
    Mission
    Mode
    Morality
    Motivation
    Mystery
    Narrative
    Nazis
    Need
    Negotiation
    Neo-Nazi
    Networking
    News
    New Year
    Norm
    Norms
    Noticing
    Online
    Operations
    Opportunity
    Oppression
    Organisation
    Organisation Develoment
    Organisation Development
    Origin
    Pace
    Panic
    Paradigm
    Paradox
    Partnership
    Passion
    Pastoral
    Pattern Matching
    Peace
    People
    Perception
    Perfectionism
    Performance
    Perseverance
    Personal Constructs
    Personal Leadership
    Person Centred
    Perspective
    Phenomenology
    Phenomenon
    Philippines
    Philosophy
    Physicality
    Plan
    Plans
    Plato
    Play
    Plot
    Polarity
    Policy
    Politics
    Poor
    Positive
    Positive Psychology
    Posture
    Potential
    Potential#
    Poverty
    Power
    Practice
    Pragmatism
    Praxis
    Prayer
    Preference
    Preferences
    Prepare
    Presence
    Principles
    Priorities
    Priority
    Privilege
    Proactivity
    Problem Solving
    Process
    Professional
    Progressive
    Projection
    Projects
    Prompt
    Propaganda
    Protection
    Protest
    Providence
    Provocative
    Psychoanalysis
    Psychodynamic
    Psychodynamics
    Psychology
    Psychometrics
    Psychotherapy
    Purpose
    Quality
    Questions
    Race
    Radical
    Rational
    Rationale
    Rationalisation
    Rationality
    Reality
    Reason
    Reasoning
    Reconciliation
    Recruitment
    Reflect
    Reflection
    Reflective Practice
    Reflexivity
    Reframing
    Refugee
    Refugees
    Relationship
    Relationships
    Release
    Religion
    Representation
    Rescue
    Research
    Resilience
    Resonance
    Resourcefulness
    Respect
    Responsibility
    Responsive
    Responsiveness
    Revelation
    Reward
    Rights
    Risk
    Role
    Role Model
    Rosabeth Moss-kanter
    Rules
    Sabbath
    Satire
    Satnav
    Saviour
    Schemata
    School
    Science
    Secure Base
    Security
    See
    Selection
    Selective Attention
    Self
    Sense Making
    Senses
    Sensitivity
    Serendipity
    Servant
    Shadow
    Significance
    Silence
    Simplicity
    Sin
    Skills
    Snake
    Social Construct
    Social Construction
    Social Constructionism
    Social Media
    Social Psychology
    Socrates
    Solution Focused
    Solutions
    Solutions Focus
    Solutions-focus
    Space
    Speed
    Spirit
    Spiritual
    Spirituality
    Stance
    Stealth
    Stereotype
    Stereotypes
    Story
    Strategic
    Strategy
    Strengths
    Stress
    Stretch
    Structure
    Struggle
    Stuck
    Style
    Subconscious
    Subjectivity
    Success
    Suffering
    Supervision
    Support
    Survival
    Sustainability
    Symbol
    Symbolism
    Systems
    Systems Thinking
    TA
    Tactical
    Tactics
    Talent
    Teacher
    Teaching
    Team
    Teamwork
    Teenage
    Theology
    Theory
    Therapy
    Thinking
    Thought
    Time
    Touch
    Toys
    Traction
    Trade
    Tradition
    Training
    Transactional Analysis
    Transference
    Transformation
    Transition
    Transitional Object
    Trauma
    Trust
    Truth
    Uncertainty
    Unexpected
    Vallues
    Value
    Valued
    Values
    Violence
    Visibility
    Vision
    Voice
    VUCA
    Vulnerability
    Vulnerable
    Waiting
    War
    Wealth
    Weird
    Wellbeing
    Will
    Willingness
    Window
    Wisdom
    Wonder
    Words
    World
    Worth
    Youth
    Zoom

    RSS Feed

Proudly powered by Weebly
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
  • Testimonials
  • Articles
    • Organisations and leadership
    • Learning and development
    • Coaching and counselling
  • Blog
  • e-Resources
  • News
  • Contact