Glimpses of Gestalt

18/4/2012

I was once invited by a coaching supervisor to depict a live piece of work with a client. I focused on a forthcoming assignment in Asia and drew a diagram representing the different people involved, the relationships between them and the explicit and implicit agendas. I drew a solid line between myself and the key client representing ‘strategy’ (explicit agenda) and a dotted line representing my underlying expertise in ‘psychological dynamics’ (implicit agenda).

She challenged me to re-draw my dotted line as a solid line, to do it and not simply to imagine how I might feel if I was to do it. This proved to be a profound and pivotal moment for me in grasping Gestalt. As I picked up the pen and drew the line, I felt a sudden, powerful and unexpected surge of confidence arise within me. It convinced me to approach the contract with the client in more confident, proactive mode and to raise my implicit value to the explicit level.

In a later coaching session, I worked with a client who explained she felt stressed working with a particular colleague on a board of trustees. I noticed how physically animated she was as she spoke and so I suggested we might explore the issue using a physical experiment, drawing on Gestalt. She was keen to try it out so I invited her to recreate the board room where we were, to sit me where her colleague sits and to brief me on how he behaves.

She left the room, re-entered and immediately stiffened and looked tense. I reflected this back, along with how tense I now felt as she approached me in role. In order to create and evoke a contrasting experience, I invited her to practice physical loosening before entering the room. She discovered a dance-like movement that helped her relax, increased her confidence and provided an alternative entry style. The difference and impact was transformational.

7 Comments

John Rowan

19/4/2012 12:50:25 pm

There is good rule from Gestalt: If a client mentions the same person again and again, say something like "I find it is usually better to talk TO a person rather than ABOUT a person. How would it be if we put the person in this empty chair, and talk to them as if they were sitting in that chair?" If that goes well , and the interaction comes alive, the next step is for the client to sit in the same chair and talk back. The interaction goes on until some useful terminus is reached. This seems so obvious to me that I use it a lot.

Nick Wright

19/4/2012 12:52:42 pm

Thanks for the note, John. Yes, there's something about talking to rather than talking about which feels so much more immediate, so much more present, and often evokes far greater awareness for the client than a less direct conversation. With best wishes. Nick

Heide Juethner-Kley

20/4/2012 06:33:49 am

John, this rule exists also as a very helpful technique in "my Logotherapy" created by Viktor Frankl. Here it is called "Fantastic Dialogue".

Bridget

6/5/2012 10:03:42 am

Hi Nick

I once did a similar exercise with a dance therapist and it was also really helpful. It seemed to me that we can affect how we act by how we feel but we can also affect how we feel, by how we act! I have found it amazing how sometimes acting confidently can actually translate into me feeling confident. What is this about? Is it something about body, soul and spirit working together?

6/5/2012 11:10:13 am

Hi Bridget and thanks for the note. I would be very interested to hear more of what you did with the dance therapist! What you describe, the interrelationship between physicality and feeling, is certainly consistent with Gestalt. Gestalt is about wholeness and it views body, mind, emotion and context of experience ('field') as inextricably linked. In this sense, an intervention in any dimension is likely to have an effect in other dimensions too. I do believe the spiritual dimension is significant too, although different Gestalt coaches would have different views about what 'spirituality' is and how it interrelates with other dimensions of human experience. With best wishes. Nick

7/5/2012 02:50:50 am

Hi Nick,

Actually, I think she may have called herself a "movement therapist". Basically, she just got me to act out/rehearse what I wanted to do (enter a room and join a discussion with senior management) and try to create the impression I wanted to create. She then asked me how I felt when doing it. She also gave me feedback, ie had I created the desired impression. As I had achieved the desired impression, it increased my confidence.

So much of this is the mirror being held up to us - yes?

7/5/2012 03:06:01 am

Hi Bridget and thanks for sharing an example of how the therapist worked with you. It sounds very similar in approach to the second example I mentioned in the blog. The points of similarity I noticed with Gestalt were (a) acting out physically, that is 'doing it' rather than imagining how it might be if you were to do it (see: http://www.nick-wright.com/just-do-it.html), (b) connecting physical experience with emotional experience and (c) providing authentic feedback as therapist on how she experienced you in that scenario. Yes, I agree with your 'mirror' analogy (it's one of my favourite analogies too). Gestalt is interested in raising client awareness, often by heightening an experience by doing or exaggerating it, in the belief that focused awareness precipitates movement and change. In that sense, it could be presented as holding a mirror before the client, in which he or she sees or experiences him or herself in new ways, thereby opening fresh possibilities for the future. With best wishes. Nick