NICK WRIGHT
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
  • Testimonials
  • Articles
    • Organisations and leadership
    • Learning and development
    • Coaching and counselling
  • Blog
  • e-Resources
  • News
  • Contact
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
  • Testimonials
  • Articles
    • Organisations and leadership
    • Learning and development
    • Coaching and counselling
  • Blog
  • e-Resources
  • News
  • Contact

Hearts and minds

17/5/2022

22 Comments

 
Picture

In its now-classic album, Hemispheres, Canadian rock band, Rush, sing a dramatic story of a cosmic struggle between competing gods of love and reason; each determined to rule humanity on its own terms. It’s a creative mythological account of the very real dilemmas and tensions we face and experience in human decision-making of head vs heart. (If interested in a faith dimension, we can see this polarity resolved in Jesus, described in the Bible as ‘full of grace and truth’, and in his call to  be ‘wise as serpents and tame as doves’). Yet, how hard it is to do this in practice.

It becomes more complex if we get caught up in emotional reasoning: ‘…the condition of being so strongly influenced by our emotions that we assume that they indicate objective truth. Whatever we feel is true, without any conditions and without any need for supporting facts or evidence’ (Therapy Now, 2021). It’s a blurring of heart and head so that the former appears to us, as if self-evidently, the latter. Betts and Collier, in their thoughtful review of refugee policy (Refuge, 2017) liken this to a ‘headless heart’; a decision driven by emotional response without due regard for consequences.

A person may hold the opposite extreme, the ‘heartless head’, where he or she believes every decision must be informed or supported by rational thinking or objective evidence - and emotion or intuition are disregarded as irrelevant or unsound. We see this in cultural environments where, as Eugene Sadler-Smith observes, leaders feel compelled to post-rationalise intuitive decisions in order to make them more acceptable to colleagues (Inside Intuition, 2007). It’s a stance that risks dismissing beliefs, values and other dimensions of sense-making, motivation and experience.

John Kotter brings words of wisdom here (Leading Change, 2012): to pay attention to our own default biases and to take account of those of others too, if we’re seeking to influence change. On presenting vision, he offers a helpful rule of thumb, ‘convincing to the mind and compelling to the heart’. The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) provides useful insight into different preferences that influence decision-making too. Rush’s epic song ends with its own solution: ‘Let the truth of Love be lighted, let the love of Truth shine clear…with Heart and Mind united in a single perfect sphere.’
22 Comments
Tara Parker link
17/5/2022 08:15:56 pm

Nick,

Balance. The heart can no more lead better without its companion, the head. Without each other the person is left leaning, lacking in the full experience of what life has to offer. To deny either the heart or the head is to be of dis-service to the self and any deity one bears witness to. I’ve been learning the concept of balance to a new depth through the perspective of those who struggle with the heart. It is this learning that has taught me more about those who struggle with their head and further help me identify not only my own balance but to help light that of others.

Beautifully written.

Tara Parker

Reply
Nick Wright
20/5/2022 11:00:16 am

Thank you, Tara. 'lacking the full experience of what life has to offer' is a great way of expressing what can happen if the balance is tipped too far one way or the other, especially if that stance is a person or group's on-going tendency and default.

Reply
Peter Daniels
20/5/2022 11:00:58 am

Wow, Nick. That Rush album brings back happy memories!! :)

Reply
Nick Wright
20/5/2022 11:04:45 am

Thanks Peter. For me too! I also loved 2112 at the time. Rush had a great talent for expressing profound human questions, experiences and feelings through drama and story.

Reply
Sandra Barker
20/5/2022 11:07:00 am

Hi Nick. Thank you for helping me to see Jesus and his amazingness in a new light. I hadn't noticed that balance within his own divinity-humanity before.

Reply
Nick Wright
20/5/2022 11:10:16 am

Thank you, Sandra. Yes...and 'divinity-humanity' is another polarity that is mysteriously reconciled in Jesus. He is truly amazing!

Reply
Olivia Waters
20/5/2022 11:17:53 am

Hello Nick. I also read 'Refuge' and was astonished by the long list of disastrous consequences of Angela Merkel's well-intended and unilateral 'open doors' decision in 2015. It was a painful example of the 'headless heart' in action, driven by compassion but not thought-through. I felt equally dismayed by the counter-reaction is provoked in the EU, tipping it to the opposite extreme as a cold example of 'heartless head'. Very sobering, especially for the real people caught up in the middle.

Reply
Nick Wright
20/5/2022 11:23:08 am

Thank you, Olivia. Yes, I agree. It was depressing for me, at the time, that most of the perverse incentives and unintended consequences that flowed from Angela Merkel's decision were entirely predictable. My sense was that she felt responsible and pressured to make a snap-decision, and did so without consulting with any of the key stakeholders who would be most impacted by her decision - and there are important lessons for change leadership and decision-making to be learned there too.

Reply
John Flintoft
20/5/2022 11:26:00 am

Hi Nick. I liked your comment about leaders post-rationalising their intuitive decisions. It begs the question of why some organisations and cultures are so biased towards rationality over other forms or ways of knowing.

Reply
Nick Wright
20/5/2022 11:36:15 am

Thank you, John. That's a very interesting question. I wonder if it could represent a spill-over from a modernist confidence in rationalism and the scientific method. I notice a similar paradigm and language being applied now in many fields (e.g. evidence-based social work; evidence-based therapeutic practice) - which, in spite of its merits, often strikes me as inappropriately reductionist in those fields.

I love the work of thought-leaders in the post-modern field of social constructionism such as Kenneth Gergen and Vivien Burr who challenge this shift at the most fundamental levels. Here is a great example (see from 3 minutes onwards):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-AsKFFX9Ib0&t=274s

Reply
Arman
22/5/2022 07:45:24 pm

Hi Nick,
Thank you for nice written!
Humans are so complex! So sometimes follow one of our source of decision is very hard(Heart or minds)!
I think the only source that help us to make better decision is get helping from light of truth (Jesus Christ).

Thank you for sharing this written. I always learn from you.
Thank god for giving us this fantastic brother.

Reply
Nick Wright
23/5/2022 12:07:26 pm

Hi Arman. Thank you for such encouraging feedback. I agree - in my own experience too, seeking help from the light of truth (Jesus Christ) can make a tremendous difference. I often sense God's 'voice' as a mysterious sense of knowing that I can't explain in other terms. Bridget Woodall describes it as a spiritual 'realisation'. It's often counter-intuitive, yet it's the route by which I have witnessed and experienced countless miracles.

Reply
Neill Hahn
23/5/2022 02:01:27 pm

I always think it's a great pity (& a bit of a con job) when ideas are reduced to being presented as a choice between only 2 extremes. Heart or Head...? That limitation leaves the infinity of possibilities; combinations and integrations unexplored. Described by black and white thinkers as annoying "grey areas" but are really where life reveals it colour... if you think beyond limiting your ideas to 2 options. Good-bad, right-wrong, etc. All things are true, it is only the scope of truth that varies. I liked the concept of the "sphere" mentioned in the song at the end of the article, as a way of getting past Head or Heart limits... a great insight.

Reply
Nick Wright
24/5/2022 10:27:14 am

Thank you, Neill. I love the way you characterise the 'grey areas' as 'where life reveals it colour.' What a great and wonderful paradox in language and experience!

Reply
Paul Shearing
24/5/2022 01:10:33 am

I like this article a lot - I have in the past been to driven too much by emotions and made decisions without weighing things up logically as they say 'fools rush in" what has helped me improve is discipling myself to wait 24 hours before acting on my impulse and that has really helped me get a better balance.

Reply
Nick Wright
24/5/2022 10:36:25 am

Thank you, Paul, for such encouraging feedback and open response. I like your idea of waiting for 24 hours. It reminded me of colleagues who draft emails but don't send them until the following day - especially if they concern issues that are emotionally charged.

Reply
Christina Nicholas
24/5/2022 01:11:58 am

There is a middle point where the opposites unite. Many mistics felt this and many lucid dreamers may experience this state. It seems to me that the prerequisite for this harmony of feeling and reason is being conscious and present in the body. Then it may be felt as a union between feeling, thinking and sensing with intuition crowning. I think that starting with the body presence provides good anchoring for persevering to be here now. Once the taste of relaxed mind and blissful body appears one is on the way to unification.
But of course majority of us needs first to resolve the emotions trapped in the body as tensions.

Reply
Nick Wright
24/5/2022 10:40:57 am

Hi Christina. Thank you for sharing such interesting reflections. I liked your description of, 'a union between thinking, feeling and sensing with intuition crowning.' On bodily knowing, are you familiar with Eugene Gendlin's work, 'Focusing' (2003)?

Reply
Christina Nicholas
24/5/2022 11:21:58 pm

Hello Nick, nice to hear from you. No, I am not familiar. I was trained 5 yrs by Gerda Boyesen School of Biodynamic (psychotherapy) in London after 6 yrs of Jungian analysis. I enjoyed both and with good outcome. I think that my mind is no longer much thrilled by new theories. But I am curious and will look at it in my spare time.

Nick Wright
26/5/2022 11:02:40 pm

Hi Christina. Wow - that's quite a career. Curiosity is a great quality. In case of interest - and I realise it may not be! - here's an article I wrote on use of physicality in Gestalt coaching: https://www.nick-wright.com/just-do-it.html. If you do read it, I would love to hear your reflections on it, based on your experiences in this and related arenas.

Ian Henderson
24/5/2022 04:58:42 pm

Thoughtful article Nick. It's a balance that I have thought and spoken about with many people. I'm not sure I have got it right yet, but there's time eh??

Reply
Nick Wright
24/5/2022 05:01:09 pm

Thank you, Ian. Yes, indeed. Me too. As my mentor says: such things are 'simple but not easy'...

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    ​Nick Wright

    ​I'm a psychological coach, trainer and OD consultant. Curious to discover how can I help you? ​Get in touch!

    Picture
    Like what you read? Simply enter your email address below to receive regular blog updates!
    Subscribe to Blog
    Picture
    Picture


    ​Archives

    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012
    February 2012
    January 2012
    December 2011
    November 2011
    October 2011
    September 2011
    August 2011
    July 2011
    June 2011
    May 2011
    April 2011
    March 2011
    February 2011

    Categories

    All
    Abc
    Ability
    Accountability
    Achievement
    Act
    Action
    Action Learning
    Activism
    Adaptability
    Adaptive
    Advent
    Adventure
    Africa
    Agency
    Agile
    Ambiguity
    Angle
    Anticipation
    Anxiety
    Appraisal
    Appreciation
    Appreciative
    Appreciative Inquiry
    Approach
    Argyris
    Asia
    Assumption
    Assumptions
    Asylum
    Attachment
    Attention
    Attitude
    Audience
    Authenticity
    Authority
    Autonomy
    Avoidance
    Awareness
    Behaviour
    Being
    Belief
    Beliefs
    Bias
    Bible
    Body Language
    Boundaries
    Brainstorming
    Brand
    Calling
    Care
    Career
    Censorship
    Challenge
    Change
    Character
    Charity
    Child
    Choice
    Choose
    Christ
    Christian
    Christmas
    Clarity
    Client
    Climate
    Coach
    Coaching
    Coactive
    Cognition
    Cognitive
    Cognitive Behavioural
    Commitment
    Communication
    Community
    Compassion
    Competence
    Competencies
    Complexity
    Concepts
    Confidence
    Conflict
    Confluence
    Congruence
    Consciousness
    Construct
    Constructs
    Construe
    Consultancy
    Contact
    Content
    Context
    Contracting
    Contribution
    Control
    Conversation
    Corruption
    Counselling
    Counterintiution
    Counterintuition
    Countertransference
    Courage
    Craziness
    Creativity
    Credibility
    Crisis
    Critical Consciousness
    Critical Reflection
    Critical Reflective Practice
    Critical Reflexivity
    Critical Thinking
    Critique
    Cross
    Cross Culture
    Cross-culture
    Culture
    Curiosity
    Customer Care
    Customers
    Customer Service
    Death
    Deception
    Decision
    Deconstruction
    Defence
    Defences
    Deferred Gratification
    Definition
    Delusion
    Democracy
    Depression
    Determination
    Development
    Deviance
    Deviant
    Diagnosis
    Disaster
    Discernment
    Disclosure
    Discovery
    Discrimination
    Disruptive
    Dissent
    Dissident
    Dissonance
    Distinctiveness
    Distortion
    Diversity
    Dream
    Dynamic
    Dynamics
    Easter
    Ecology
    Edge
    Edi
    Education
    Effectiveness
    Efficiency
    Ego State
    Eliciting
    Emergence
    Emotion
    Emotional
    Emotional Intelligence
    Empathy
    Empowerment
    Encouragement
    Energy
    Engagement
    Environment
    Equality
    Eternity
    Ethics
    Ethiopia
    Evaluation
    Evidence
    Evocative
    Existential
    Existentialism
    Expectation
    Expectations
    Experience
    Experiment
    Experimentation
    Exploration
    Explore
    Exposure
    Facilitation
    Faith
    Fear
    Feedback
    Feeling
    Feminism
    Figure
    Filter
    Fit
    Flashback
    Focus
    Forgiveness
    Framework
    Freedom
    Freud
    Fun
    Future
    Gender
    Geopolitical
    Geopolitics
    Gestalt
    Global
    Goal
    Goals
    God
    Gospel
    Grace
    Grief
    Grit
    Ground
    Group
    Guidance
    Healing
    Health
    Hear
    Heidegger
    Hero
    Hope
    Human
    Human Givens
    Humanity
    Human Resources
    Human Rights
    Humility
    Humour
    Hybrid
    Hypotheses
    Hypothesis
    Icon
    Ideation
    Identity
    Image
    Imagination
    Impact
    Impostor
    Inclusion
    Independence
    Influence
    INGO
    Initiative
    Injustice
    Innovation
    Inquiry
    Insecurity
    Insight
    Inspiration
    Instinct
    Integrity
    Intention
    Interdependence
    Interference
    International
    Interpretation
    Intimacy
    Introversion
    Intuition
    Invisible
    Jargon
    Jesus
    Journey
    Jungle
    Justice
    Keys
    Knowing
    Knowledge
    Labels
    Language
    Lateral Thinking
    Leader
    Leadership
    Learner
    Learning
    Lesson
    Liberal
    Life
    Light
    Listening
    Logic
    Loss
    Love
    Management
    Manager
    Marathon
    Matrix
    Mbti
    Meaning
    Media
    Mediation
    Meetings
    Memory
    Mentoring
    Merit
    Metaphor
    Metaphysic
    Mindfulness
    Miracle
    Mirroring
    Misfit
    Mission
    Mode
    Morality
    Motivation
    Mystery
    Narrative
    Nazis
    Need
    Negotiation
    Neo-Nazi
    Networking
    News
    New Year
    Norm
    Norms
    Noticing
    Online
    Operations
    Opportunity
    Oppression
    Organisation
    Organisation Develoment
    Organisation Development
    Origin
    Pace
    Panic
    Paradigm
    Paradox
    Partnership
    Passion
    Pastoral
    Pattern Matching
    Peace
    People
    Perception
    Perfectionism
    Performance
    Perseverance
    Personal Constructs
    Personal Leadership
    Person Centred
    Perspective
    Phenomenology
    Phenomenon
    Philippines
    Philosophy
    Physicality
    Plan
    Plans
    Plato
    Play
    Plot
    Polarity
    Policy
    Politics
    Poor
    Positive
    Positive Psychology
    Posture
    Potential
    Potential#
    Poverty
    Power
    Practice
    Pragmatism
    Praxis
    Prayer
    Preference
    Preferences
    Prepare
    Presence
    Principles
    Priorities
    Priority
    Privilege
    Proactivity
    Problem Solving
    Process
    Professional
    Progressive
    Projection
    Projects
    Prompt
    Propaganda
    Protection
    Protest
    Providence
    Provocative
    Psychoanalysis
    Psychodynamic
    Psychodynamics
    Psychology
    Psychometrics
    Psychotherapy
    Purpose
    Quality
    Questions
    Race
    Radical
    Rational
    Rationale
    Rationalisation
    Rationality
    Reality
    Reason
    Reasoning
    Reconciliation
    Recruitment
    Reflect
    Reflection
    Reflective Practice
    Reflexivity
    Reframing
    Refugee
    Refugees
    Relationship
    Relationships
    Release
    Religion
    Representation
    Rescue
    Research
    Resilience
    Resonance
    Resourcefulness
    Respect
    Responsibility
    Responsive
    Responsiveness
    Revelation
    Reward
    Rights
    Risk
    Role
    Role Model
    Rosabeth Moss-kanter
    Rules
    Sabbath
    Satire
    Satnav
    Saviour
    Schemata
    School
    Science
    Secure Base
    Security
    See
    Selection
    Selective Attention
    Self
    Sense Making
    Senses
    Sensitivity
    Serendipity
    Servant
    Shadow
    Significance
    Silence
    Simplicity
    Sin
    Skills
    Snake
    Social Construct
    Social Construction
    Social Constructionism
    Social Media
    Social Psychology
    Socrates
    Solution Focused
    Solutions
    Solutions Focus
    Solutions-focus
    Space
    Speed
    Spirit
    Spiritual
    Spirituality
    Stance
    Stealth
    Stereotype
    Stereotypes
    Story
    Strategic
    Strategy
    Strengths
    Stress
    Stretch
    Structure
    Struggle
    Stuck
    Style
    Subconscious
    Subjectivity
    Success
    Suffering
    Supervision
    Support
    Survival
    Sustainability
    Symbol
    Symbolism
    Systems
    Systems Thinking
    TA
    Tactical
    Tactics
    Talent
    Teacher
    Teaching
    Team
    Teamwork
    Teenage
    Theology
    Theory
    Therapy
    Thinking
    Thought
    Time
    Touch
    Toys
    Traction
    Trade
    Tradition
    Training
    Transactional Analysis
    Transference
    Transformation
    Transition
    Transitional Object
    Trauma
    Trust
    Truth
    Uncertainty
    Unexpected
    Vallues
    Value
    Valued
    Values
    Violence
    Visibility
    Vision
    Voice
    VUCA
    Vulnerability
    Vulnerable
    Waiting
    War
    Wealth
    Weird
    Wellbeing
    Will
    Willingness
    Window
    Wisdom
    Wonder
    Words
    World
    Worth
    Youth
    Zoom

    RSS Feed

Proudly powered by Weebly
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
  • Testimonials
  • Articles
    • Organisations and leadership
    • Learning and development
    • Coaching and counselling
  • Blog
  • e-Resources
  • News
  • Contact