NICK WRIGHT
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Isolationship

26/3/2020

30 Comments

 
Lockdown, as a self- or state-imposed isolation from other people, is a physical response to a physical threat, a measure taken to limit the impact of a clear and present danger. The current, global, disease crisis-response is a very explicit case in point. Yet every action risks creating its own unintended consequences. Take, for instance, mental and physical health problems that may well result from media-induced fear and panic; sustained social isolation; reduced physical exercise.

Cast your eye to the poorer countries and communities in the world, and the list grows much longer. You can add stress from lost essential livelihoods; lack of access to food, safe water, sanitation and health facilities; increased risks of corruption and exploitation of the most vulnerable people. So, in the face of such existential threats, what can we do? William Glasser, a choice-theory, relational psychotherapist, offers useful insight in his 3Rs formula: Reality + Responsibility + Relationship.
​
Reality: Look beyond our own immediate thoughts, feelings and circumstances to see, where possible, a bigger picture. Reflect critically on what we see and hear in the media. Keep things in perspective. Responsibility: Acknowledge that our actions in the face of adversity represent choices. We can make different choices. Do what is right, not just what is expedient. Relationships: Look outwards when tempted to close inwards. Ask for support. Offer it too. Keep in touch. Pray.

Would you find coaching with the 3xRs helpful? Get in touch! [email protected]
30 Comments
Jonathan Myers
26/3/2020 01:40:50 pm

Amen!

Reply
Nick Wright
26/3/2020 01:43:02 pm

Thanks Jonathan. 🙏

Reply
Sharon King
26/3/2020 01:41:39 pm

Love this article Nick very useful and helpful some reason at this difficult time.

Reply
Nick Wright
26/3/2020 01:42:21 pm

Thanks Sharon. If there's anything I can do to help, get in touch.

Reply
Felicity Clarke
26/3/2020 01:44:44 pm

In an isolationship - love this phrase!! :)

Reply
Nick Wright
26/3/2020 01:45:52 pm

Thanks Felcity. I had never heard it until this week. Perhaps one good thing to come out of the Coronacrisis?!

Reply
Felicity Clarke
26/3/2020 02:09:56 pm

Haha Nick these puns are brightening my day!

Nick Wright
26/3/2020 02:10:28 pm

😎🙏☀️

Tara Parker link
26/3/2020 02:36:37 pm

Nick,

Once, again, you have pinpointed an area many overlook on a "good day" only to completely devalue it in more troubled times despite the worldwide reach of the present situation.

As I have observed the overbuying induced by an abuse of media resources I am amazed at the level to which many will go to in an attempt to guarantee a version of survival. These actions are putting more at risk but that seems to be the intent, whether realized or not.

My observations also realized that when the world is missing the point. We are not here for ourselves but for one another. While we do need to provide to ourselves in order to serve to the best capacity we forget to enjoy helping and providing to others. This current world crisis is the opportunity to become servant leaders or servant followers, which ever suits your situation. This is an opportunity to truly pay it forward by extending what you have to those in need. May we all take a look at the world around us and realize what the need is and determine how we can positively impact it.

Thank you for the mindful and thought promoting writing.

As always,

Tara

Reply
Nick Wright
26/3/2020 03:04:21 pm

Thank you for such encouraging feedback, Tara. The positive spirit you exemplify in your reflections resonates well with an article I read online just now: 'Fear of Covid-19 is a mental contagion - and that's something we can fight': https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/mar/26/fear-of-covid-19-is-a-mental-contagion-ben-okri

Reply
Tara Parker link
26/3/2020 03:13:13 pm

Nick,

I appreciate the response; thank you.

I have read the article and the writer makes valid points about how we, as a society, takes for granted what we have before us. We devalue the low times looking at these gloomy situations as an ending when it reality, it is an experience - and one to learn well from. I think it would be great for those gifted in word could continue to spread the message that the end is not near but rather another beginning.

Tara

Nick Wright
26/3/2020 03:18:18 pm

Hi Tara. I love that: 'the end is not near but rather another beginning.' I hope that we as people, communities, nations and world will be open enough to hear and learn the vital lessons this crisis can offer to us.

Lilin Lim
26/3/2020 03:37:56 pm

Very insightful.

Reply
Nick Wright
26/3/2020 03:38:23 pm

Thanks Lilin!

Reply
Birgit Wilke
26/3/2020 03:39:41 pm

Ich finde das klingt sehr realistisch, mit Weitblick und auch positiv.

Reply
Nick Wright
26/3/2020 03:40:22 pm

Danke Birgit. Ich hoffe es. ☀️

Reply
Dr. Harold Hinsley
27/3/2020 05:52:02 am

Just got out of isolation.

Reply
Nick Wright
27/3/2020 05:52:56 am

Hi Harold. How did you manage it? Stay safe.

Reply
Vicky Kapatos
27/3/2020 05:55:32 am

Beautifully expressed
Eloquent
Thank you for the post.

Reply
Nick Wright
27/3/2020 05:57:05 am

Thank you for your kind feedback, Vicky. You’re welcome. 😃

Reply
Dawn Scott
27/3/2020 02:32:21 pm

Just so you Nick. Hope you’re well ❤️

Reply
Nick Wright
27/3/2020 02:33:50 pm

Thanks Dawn. I try to practise what I preach..! 🙂 Stay safe and stay well.

Reply
Matt Omslaer
30/3/2020 12:23:03 am

I agree with this message. The entire world needs a new positive direction instead of operating out of fear.

Something I'd add to this is what I'd like to see is everyone on this planet working together even outside of the times of crisis for the common good of humanity as a whole and even for the good of other species that we share this planet with instead of being divided like we normally are.

A good supporting example of what you're saying actually happened here in the United States during this situation.

The media created mass panic and we were thrown into lockdown. Almost everything closed. Truckers were struggling to get food and on the verge of quitting their jobs.

If truckers quit in the USA no one would have access to food and much needed supplies which in turn puts more than 327,000,000 lives in jeopardy via starvation.

Starvation alone typically kills in 7 days.

So me and 250,000 entrepreneurs set in motion a chain of events to get food to the truckers so they would keep working.

The result: truckers are delivering food and much needed supplies and shelves are getting restocked.

What would you recommend that we can do to help impoverished countries?

Reply
Nick Wright
30/3/2020 12:56:21 pm

Hi Matt. Thank you for sharing such a great example of looking at the world and acting macro-systemically to influence change. I would love to hear more about the 'chain of events' vis a vis the truckers. It sounds both intriguing and effective!

The impoverished countries question is a complex one. There tend to be so many players already involved (e.g. UN, NGOs, civil society) so the simplest solution is to support the work of a body that is already engaged systemically, e.g. World Vision.

I've spent most of my life working with NGOs and now try, too, to offer support to star players on the ground who are already doing amazing things. Here's a great example: http://www.nick-wright.com/a-radical-heart.html. Keep up the good work!

Reply
Jaimie Shires
6/4/2020 07:45:30 pm

Thanks for your post. I like how you've used the 3 R's as a tool to keep things in perspective. I'd like to add Self-care (prioritising our mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health) to your list, if I may. I think it falls under Responsibility and Relationships. It is more important than ever to tune into our worries and needs and take the necessary action (doing what helps us feel good) to stay well during this time. How else will we overcome this as individuals and collectively?

You may be familiar with Dr.David Rock's SCARF model...another helpful tool in understanding why we feel the way we do and enabling us to use motivations/personal rewards to feel better.

Reply
Nick Wright
6/4/2020 10:40:30 pm

Thanks Jaimie. Yes, finding ways of self-care, alongside others-care, is very important; especially when people are in isolation and thereby separated from some of the people and things that ordinarily contribute to mental, physical and social wellbeing.

It reminds me of the 'Learning Zone' and 'Growth Zone' in this model that I saw posted on Facebook this week: https://blauberg.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/CIRCLE-COVID-19-Safety-Health.pdf

I'm not familiar with David Rock's SCARF Model but have just Googled it and it looks interesting - I will research it further. Thanks for referencing it!

Reply
Enrique Aponte Jr.
6/4/2020 10:42:12 pm

Very good I will re-post this one. Easy and to the point. Thank you, Nick.

Reply
Nick Wright
6/4/2020 10:42:39 pm

Thank you, Enrique. You're welcome.

Reply
Ian Henderson link
5/1/2021 11:07:51 am

Thanks for your valuable and timely insight Nick - it has made me pause and reflect on my life at this time. God bless you my good friend.

Reply
Nick Wright
22/7/2021 05:33:01 pm

Thank you, Ian, for such encouraging feedback - and apologies for the long delay in responding!! (I have only just seen your posting...). God bless you too. :)

Reply



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    ​Nick Wright

    ​I'm a psychological coach, trainer and OD consultant. Curious to discover how can I help you? ​Get in touch!

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