‘The question is: how to ensure a healthy life-life, work-work and life-work balance?’ It felt like losing the plot. Spinning plates isn’t unusual or new yet, as a freelancer, the tell-tale signs were beginning to show. I met with my coach, Sue, to re-ground myself and my work before, like some scene from a Greek wedding, plates began to fall and smash in pieces around me. Sue asked me, ‘If you were to conduct an appraisal of your life and work for the past 12 months, what would the highlights be? How would you rate your life and business health and performance?’ My mind immediately went blank. I had allowed myself to become so busy that the year was a total blur. So, I sat down that evening, took out my diary and created a simple summary. I discovered to my surprise that I had worked with people from 150 organisations (charities; NGOs; churches; public sector, e.g. social services, health, education, police); from 35 countries; 60 coaching sessions; 30 training workshops; 25 action learning set meetings; written 25 articles and blogs; provided ad hoc TESOL support for refugees and asylum seekers; and, by God’s amazing grace and the generosity of family and friends, sent £23k in support to the poorest and most vulnerable in the Philippines. Strikingly, until I did this review, I had no idea. I had lost sight and sense of the wood in the midst of the trees. So, Sue asked me next what I enjoy most about this kind of work-life that I choose to live. I responded, ‘A sense of purpose as a follower of Jesus – and freedom.’ She came straight back with a challenge: ‘Where, for you, is the boundary between freedom and chaos?’ That hit the nail on the head, hard. Freedom is, for me, tied up closely with choice. I was at risk of becoming reactive, falling backwards. I needed to regain my balance, my grounded stance, to be truly free to choose again. Sue offered a suggestion. ‘How would it be if you were to set aside periodic ‘Creating Freedom’ days in your diary – to do those things (apart from your work) that you find life-giving and will help keep you grounded; or that will drain away your life and perspective if you don’t do them?’ That was a great insight and idea. That evening, I marked out spaces in my calendar for silent prayer, physical exercise, time with family and friends, holiday breaks; and for doing the headache-inducing financial and administrative parts of my life-work that I would otherwise procrastinate over or subtly avoid. That was my confession and solution. How do you ensure a healthy sense of purpose, perspective and priority in your own life and work?
18 Comments
Hannah Sheldon
30/7/2022 02:57:36 pm
Hi Nick. It’s fabulous as a freelancer that you have so much work!
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Nick Wright
31/7/2022 04:24:06 pm
Hi Hannah. Yes, I am very grateful for the opportunities that God opens up to me.
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Sue Murkin
30/7/2022 04:37:32 pm
I LOVE this Nick! Great you had the time to write this!
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Nick Wright
31/7/2022 04:21:54 pm
Thank you, Sue. Yes - thanks to your inspiring and effective coaching!
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David Almond
31/7/2022 04:27:52 pm
Hi Nick. I'm not surprised you lost the plot in the midst of all that going on. I think another question could be 'Where for you (and for me) is the boundary between enough and too much?'
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Nick Wright
31/7/2022 04:31:12 pm
Hi David. That's a great question too. I was certainly at the edge of too-much when I met with Sue as my coach. It's a risk for me because my work is my passion and my calling. I don't want to miss any opportunities where I could make a difference for good. I need to balance my zeal with wisdom, to avoid too-busy.
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Sandra Wilson
31/7/2022 04:32:30 pm
Hello Nick. What a great and interesting variety in your work. Do you ever stop to breathe a little..?
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Nick Wright
31/7/2022 04:37:51 pm
Hi Sandra. Yes, I love my work. I do try to stop to breathe...and I continually need to remind myself to do it..!
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John Heron
31/7/2022 04:41:54 pm
Hi Nick. I was interested to read about the type and range of organisations you work with. Is that by accident or design?
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Nick Wright
31/7/2022 04:49:22 pm
Hi John. Yes, I work with people, teams and organisations in the beyond-profit sector. Whist there are commercial businesses that provide e.g. health and social services too, I remember saying to one of my earlier coaches whilst focusing my passion: 'I have no interest in helping the rich get richer.' I hate that the poor are so vulnerable. I focus my efforts on trying to make the greatest positive difference in the world for those who are poor and most vulnerable.
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John Heron
31/7/2022 07:08:33 pm
Hi Nick. I get that. But isn't it a bit judgemental of commercial businesses and those who work for them?
Nick Wright
31/7/2022 07:10:09 pm
Hi John. That's a fair challenge. I hope not. Commercial enterprise and wealth can do a lot to benefit people and societies and there are many great coaches who can help people and businesses do that well. It's just now where my own calling lays.
Ian Henderson
1/8/2022 10:19:41 am
Powerful piece Nick and one that gets one thinking. I'm not sure I have mastered the balancing act just yet even now I have retired!!!
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Nick Wright
1/8/2022 01:01:47 pm
Thank you, Ian. Yes - a balancing act, and a tricky one at that - is a great way to describe it..!
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Peter Wisdom
1/8/2022 12:59:18 pm
Great article, Nick! Extraordinary year of engagement and wonderfully insightful questions from your coach. It's a humbling fact that we can never do enough no matter how much we do - so boundaries are needed to ensure we can flourish personally to be able to give our maximum and to ensure we don't do too little. Have I succeeded in living this out? Nowhere near!!
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Nick Wright
1/8/2022 01:05:49 pm
Thank you, Peter. Yes, indeed. I often use the metaphor with clients of a very large pile of sand. No matter how much sand we manage to scrape away at the bottom - e.g. with a teaspoon - more sand simply falls in to take its place. Given that reality, the question often shifts to one of prayer, values and priorities and...flowing from that...critical choices.
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Arman
3/8/2022 10:59:04 am
Hi Nick,
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Nick Wright
3/8/2022 11:37:41 am
Thank you, Arman. I feel genuinely privileged to have had so many God-given opportunities in my life and work. And yes - I love that photo too! :)
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Nick WrightI'm a psychological coach, trainer and OD consultant. Curious to discover how can I help you? Get in touch! Like what you read? Simply enter your email address below to receive regular blog updates!
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