Nixit

26/6/2016

Someone just called me, ‘Nixit’. It made me smile. :) I had posted this piece (below) on Facebook as a direct and deliberate challenge to bitter vitriol, negative stereotyping and harsh demonising on social media of people who voted ‘Leave’ in the UK-EU referendum last week.

I feel a bit nervous because, with frayed tempers running high this weekend, it’s very hard to speak and be heard. I can say, however, that everyone I know who voted ‘Remain’ did so with sincere beliefs and honourable intentions. I hope some will feel able to hear me. I hope I will hear too.

I voted Leave.

‘Leave voters are inward-looking.’

OK. I’ve been to France, Germany, Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, Switzerland, Lichtenstein, Austria, Italy, Albania, Yugoslavia, Czech Republic, Greece, Turkey, Lebanon, Israel, West Bank, Uganda, Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand, Singapore, Australia, Canada, United States. You?

‘Leave voters are ignorant and uneducated.’

OK. I have a first degree with honours, a postgraduate diploma with distinction, a masters degree with distinction. I’m a fellow of a UK professional Institute, have had over 100 articles published in journals and have spoken at various UK and international conferences. You?

‘Leave voters are selfish.’

OK. I’m not Mother Teresa. However, I’ve worked my entire adult life with charities and international NGOs in countries including UK, Germany, Albania, Lebanon, West Bank, Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand, Singapore, Australia, Canada, United States. I’ve been a lifelong supporter of numerous organisations including Amnesty International and Greenpeace. You?

‘Leave voters are right wing, xenophobic racists.’

OK. I’ve been a lifelong leftist, worked in political/human rights for Latino people in El Salvador/Central America, worked in a Palestinian hospital for Muslim children with disabilities, worked in anti-Nazi projects in Germany, taught English to Vietnamese refugees, taught East European people, worked with African people from vulnerable contexts and people from almost every country in Asia. You?

‘Leave voters are nationalistic fascists.’

I’m pro-European and pro-International; pro-refugee and pro-migration; pro-democracy and pro-human rights. Until 2 years ago, I was passionately pro-EU. I voted Leave because, among other things, I feel desperately concerned about rising nationalism across the EU and beyond which is, in my view, fuelled by EU strategy, policy and behaviour.

A lot of good people disagree with me and voted Remain. Respect.

A lot of good people voted Leave too.

We may have more in common than we know. That is my hope.

28 Comments

Brian Casem

26/6/2016 05:54:14 pm

I am SO glad you wrote this, Nick Wright. I not only hear you; I see you, too. What you write is PERFECT in every way. Now...all the haters of your stance on "Leave" will hate you. Why? They are haters. That's what they do. Are they evil? Let me define to you what I believe is "essential" evil; what is the foundation of all evil.

To me, Essential evil...the worst kind of terrible awful "Anything" that a person can do to another person (I'm getting to the evil...but...it's a process...bear with me) is steal another's choice. How do we steal choices? One way is by undermining another's perception by associating it with with the worst expression of dark nature. In other words...by taking something so personally that they try to do voodoo jedi mind tricks and cast spells of binding by associating another's belief with the worst most awful thing they can think of.

This is shaming. Shaming? Shaming an adult who possesses a whole life time of experience that leads him/her to their particular understanding of the world and who stands living which is a testimony to the viability of the perspective? Why would anyone consider shaming to be required to change another's belief?

Ahhhh....evil...people resort to evil when they are not high in personal integrity, they must resort to force to get their own way...they are not comfortable enough in their own experience to trust a democratic process. The defensive types...who can't stand on their own. These are dependent types. Ironically...there is nothing wrong with that either; nothing wrong at all . Seeking a shared responsibility is actually a good thing...IF all involved agree. If not? It falls apart, and so...this scares people who are dependent.

But we should give them a break because, essentially, that mentality is what evolved human kind to what it is today. We are social creatures, you see. Democracy is a very good process...but to enact it well, we need to play fairly...not act from evil (fear, and by fear steal another's choice through hubris) through dumb jedi mind tricks. Coincidentally, Dependent types (lets call it group mind) need leaders (Independent mind). How do we judge a good leader? Look for signs of evil and avoid that person (or group of people). Who makes good followers?

Look for signs of evil, and cut them off from your group. They will congregate, pick and choose amongst themselves followers and leaders, and either they will self destruct or cause great mayhem because they are haters. The signs will always be there for us to see. Live free. Offer choice. This is harmony (big picture...not self serving) Thanks for the GREAT insight! It is ABSOLUTELY perfect!!

Nick Wright

26/6/2016 06:20:15 pm

Hi Brian and thank you for such warm and affirming feedback. You always have such profound and stimulating insights and ways of expressing these things!

I was really struck by your comment that 'evil is to steal another's choice.' One of my concerns about the EU's expansion policy is that, as it grows and centralises decision-making, ever greater numbers of people have a diminishing felt-sense of being able to influence or change anything. I think that's at the heart of being and feeling disenfranchised. To think of disenfranchisement as people having less and less choice in what their future holds for them could be another way of framing it.

This means that the EU faces a paradox. As it expands its size in order to exercise greater global influence (which can, potentially, provide EU people with a sense of security and pride at being part of something bigger), more and more people feel disenfranchised and drawn to nationalism as a way of regaining a greater personal/local sense of power, control and influence.

My sense is that many people in the UK feel torn between a desire for a greater felt-sense of independence on the one hand and a greater felt-sense of being part of something bigger on the other. And, beyond desire, strong (and sometimes radically different) beliefs about what will be best for Britain and wider Europe. This tension is reflected in the referendum outcome.

And now, given the outcome of the referendum, many people in the Remain camp feel worried and disenfranchised over an issue that they believe is critically important for the future of the UK and EU: hence the feelings of anger and dismay.

Added to that, the competing political campaigns leading up to the referendum focused on dramatising and polarising issues in such a way that has left supporters of different camps feeling dramatised and polarised too. An important question now is to focus on what kind of UK, Europe and wider world we want for the future and how to find ways of building fresh hope and relationships on new shared ground.

That was my purpose in posting this blog. Thank you again for your kind words and great insights. All the best. Nick

26/6/2016 09:19:18 pm

You nailed it!

26/6/2016 09:29:07 pm

Once I argued with a man of opposing view. When he could not persuade me he said, "Oh...but YOU are going to be responsible when it all goes to hell." I can not really describe the feeling I felt, but it didn't take long to turn to utter outrage and retaliation...regressed screaming, flipping the bird and walking away in a huff. Oh...by the way, this was my partner...and yea...we're still together!! LOL Just stick to freedom...there can always be made room for forgiveness...acceptance even in opposition. When I was outraged it was because I fell for the illusion...that I could possibly be responsible for the entirety of EVERYTHING WRONG. No. It's an evil trick.

I can only be responsible for ME. And I share this world with 7 billion other people, and collectively...we come to a consensus. With so many people, democracy is the best choice if you want "Freedom." We help each other bear through the consequences of our choice...weather good or bad...we still hold together.

Otherwise...the other option...is war, death...the ultimate taking of choice. This is why murder is a cardinal Sin... Choosing to cooperate...have faith when we loose our way to another...have grace when we win for we could loose in the next second and the one we first won over will be the one that saves us the second time around. WE all get a chance to win...if we cooperate...have patience...have faith...have grace.

26/6/2016 09:37:17 pm

Beautifully said, Brian - and a real inspiration! All the best and thank you again. Nick

Gauhar Husain

26/6/2016 06:56:38 pm

Hi Nick! It is a nice article. But you know I try to look at things from different angle. I have been following this. At the moment the emotions are high, which is but natural. Further the extent of ownership to their opinion is credible. I do not want to go into the argument of who is right or who is wrong. These emotions will settle down and hopefully people will look into what they opted for and if they do so sincerely, next time they will make a better decision. Britons are one nation and it is now up to the wisdom of the leadership to steer them to calmer waters and look ahead for better future.

26/6/2016 07:00:32 pm

Thank you, Gauhar. You are a wise man. :) Yes, I agree, it is early days. People are understandably feeling strongly about things that are incredibly important to them. I too hope that things will settle down over time so that we can build positive relationships within and outside of the UK and fresh hope for the future. All the best. Nick

Concetta Perot

27/6/2016 09:21:12 am

Posted on my FB.

27/6/2016 09:23:08 am

Thanks, Concetta - and great to hear from you after so many years. :) Let me know if you'd like to meet up in London sometime? All the best. Nick

Ian Henderson

27/6/2016 10:21:34 am

A very well argued and balanced piece Nick. If only we would all be less judgmental of others before we get to understand their perspectives I believe this world that we inhabit for a short time would be a fairer and better place to live. I have friends and family on both sides of the EU debate, all of whom have valid opinions in my book. Does anybody have the monopoly on the 'truth of the situation'?

27/6/2016 10:37:28 am

Thanks Ian. I guess if feels difficult to be 'balanced' when we feel deeply and passionately about something that we perceive to have such massive implications for ourselves, others and the future. There were so many lies, distortions and half-truths on both sides in the lead up to the referendum that it left many people feeling confused and/or frightened.

I do feel concerned now about things like the 3m+ petition to run a 2nd referendum. I understand the sentiment and it reveals the strength of feeling of some people who feel deeply unhappy about the result. At the same time, it would pose, in my view, a serious threat to democratic values. There is more at stake here than Brexit. All the best and thanks again. Nick

Deborah link

27/6/2016 11:15:43 am

Hi Nick

I'm amazed at the anger and frightening posts that are on FB, Twitter and in the press. So far I've been lucky and have not been verbally attacked. I say lucky because I do not like confrontation and nastiness - it upsets me.

I am not racist either - far from it. I'm from Oxford originally. At school I had friends who were Dutch, Italian, French and Asian. Later on in my role as a manager, I employed people for their ability to do the job they were being interviewed for. I employed staff regardless of their race or sexuality.

I am concerned about immigration purely and simply because as a country we are full up!!

I want us in Great Britain to be responsible for making our own decisions. I do not want somebody sitting in Brussels telling our government how they should be running our wonderful country.

I like David Cameron very much but, why did he, George Osbourne and even the President of the United States make threats should we vote for Brexit.

I don't pretend to be highly educated but I am far from stupid and do not regret voting for Brexit at all. I firmly believe in the long run our country will be a better country to live in for us and our children.

Hope I haven't waffled too much Nick.

Warm regards

Deborah.

27/6/2016 11:40:19 am

Hi Deborah and thanks for posting such an honest response. I've heard similar comments from lots of other people this weekend, many feeling afraid to speak up for fear of verbal abuse. That's one reason why I posted this blog. I can also understand something of the strong feelings of those who had voted Remain and are now frustrated or fearful of the future.

Unfortunately, branding people as 'racist' who hold honest concerns about, say, immigration, often inadvertently pushes them further to the right. Martin Luther King once commented that, 'violence is the voice of the unheard'. If people feel silenced by the mainstream or a vociferous minority, they will often look for a place where they do feel heard and understood and, sadly, that is sometimes with the far right.

I agree with your desire to uphold and restore democracy where it has been lost. We have opportunity in this new place to engage in fresh, honest and visionary dialogue about what kind of UK we want to build for the future. I hope that will be against the backdrop of a vision for a more hopeful and life-giving world, especially for those who are most vulnerable or marginalised.

Thanks again for posting with such honesty. All the best. Nick

John Whalley

27/6/2016 11:24:57 am

Kubler-Ross springs to mind plus the Chimp Paradox. Rational thought will follow. Peace and love!

27/6/2016 11:26:50 am

Hi John and thanks for the note. Yes, Kubler-Ross has been in my mind all weekend too! :) I've never heard of the Chimp Paradox but I'm intrigued. What does it mean? Yes to peace and love! All the best. Nick

Stella Goddard BA (Hons) Registered MBACP (Accred)

27/6/2016 04:23:57 pm

Interesting thoughts John - When you say Kubler-Ross do you mean the 'Grief Cycle?' If so then yes, shock, numbness, bargaining, anger ... and eventually acceptance - of course we all know that this process is not linear.

27/6/2016 04:25:41 pm

Thank you for this article Nick - it is well reasoned and well expressed, in my opinion. I am saddened by vitriolic feelings on both sides that currently are making it nigh on impossible to have a reasoned conversation about the results of the EU referendum. Each side seems to be blaming the other. If you voted 'Leave' then apparently you're a racist and a fascist etc etc. If you voted 'Stay'... everything would be just fine. The general feeling from those who voted 'Stay' it would appear is that those who have voted Leave have caused the implosion that seems to be happening at the moment. I really do hope that we will all be able to talk to each other reasonably, calmly and respectfully even if the person we are speaking with and to has voted a different way. The situation is as it is now and all we can do is deal with the reality of that. I am glad that we have a democracy in this country - it is not so everywhere. Should we have had a referendum at this point? I really don't know I am not a politician. I do care though about the UK which is my country and about all the other people too - whatever nationality they are.

27/6/2016 04:28:51 pm

Thank you, Stella. Yes, there appears to be lots of heat and not a lot of light in the debate at the moment, partly fuelled by the media that loves a good drama in order to increase sales or ratings. Some of the predictions before the referendum caused a lot of fear. I hope that, when the dust settles and people realise that the sky hasn't fallen down, we can start to build a new vision and future together. Thanks again and all the best. Nick

27/6/2016 04:35:40 pm

Nick You are probably aware from the news that there are some questions about the 3m petition to run a 2nd referendum - apparently there are some concerns about who set this up, the number of names and whether it is genuine (can't recall just now where I read that - perhaps someone else will remember) I don't doubt though that there are many who would like us to have another referendum. I wonder too how that would impact democracy though I can and do understand the strength of feelings on both sides.

27/6/2016 04:43:26 pm

Hi Stella.. Yes, I'm aware of the petition for a 2nd referendum. I can understand and empathise with the sentiment. However, in my view, the proposal and reasons I've seen that underpin it tear at the roots of liberal democracy. It begs all kinds of questions such as what it means to trust the electorate; what level of knowledge and understanding is required before a person should be considered eligible to vote; who decides which knowledge is true and relevant and whether a person has properly understood it - and its implications; what process should we use in practice to test that everyone qualifies according to whatever criteria we use above etc. And...if we did run with it...what would we do if it yielded the same result as the 1st referendum...and what impact would all the uncertainty have in the meantime on the UK-EU economies etc. Just a few thoughts..! All the best. Nick

Adrian link

27/6/2016 05:01:09 pm

There was a good article I read somewhere (FT I think) that also talked about the economic impact in the UK and how that was also leaving people with 'historic' roles feeling similarly disenfranchised; and some of the post vote behaviour is playing straight into that space. Out voters are stupid, uneducated, ignorant etc.
The real challenge is to ask how we were so complicit with the way we allowed this country to be governed that we alienated so many people and then poured scorn on them!

27/6/2016 05:07:50 pm

Thanks Adrian. I think that's such an important point. When we think about 'where the problem lies in society' politicians and media often point the proverbial finger at the disgruntled who feel marginalised and call them ignorant, racist etc. It's as if the 'problem' is located in the individual who doesn't support or identify with the mainstream, powerful or vocal voices, rather than looking systemically at what leaves people feeling and becoming marginalised in the first place. The flipside is to ask 'where the hope lies in society' and we may discover it's in the same people, if we are willing to listen and include. All the best. Nick

Julian Srodecki

27/6/2016 05:10:51 pm

I Nick I think that a big thing for us to look at is not what Leave voters are or are not, but why did they vote Leave and what kind of a mandate is there to do what should happen next. Leave voters were a mixed coalition of interests that are not be compatible. Individuals may have voted leave as a positive statement of what should happen next. However as a group the only thing that they have in common is wanting to leave not what they want to leave too. It is also distressing to see how some key things that people were voting leave for have already been disowned by key figures in that campaign. (E.g. curbs on migration, more money for the NHS etc). As we move forward in the UK in the coming months it seems to me that currently no one has a mandate to say what will happen next. How we ensure that who ever takes next steps does have a democratic mandate is a minefield that will be an interesting challenge going forwards. We need people to support and vote for a vision that comes next - currently this is lacking. Wether this is via a general election, a new referendum or something else I do not know.

27/6/2016 05:33:21 pm

Hi Julian and thanks for the note. I think that's true that people will have voted Leave for all kinds of reasons. I believe that's the same for people who voted Remain too. I guess that's the same in any open democratic process, including a general election. People will coalesce around a common vision, idea or concern, especially since options are necessarily limited (e.g. between X, Y or Z political party or between Remain or Leave).

The 'more money for the NHS' debate is an interesting one. I never actually heard anyone that has the authority to make that commitment commit to it in the Leave campaign - although I could be wrong and that may have been what some people understandably assumed. I heard it more as, 'This is the kind of thing we could do if that money were available'. Whether it was ever meaningful to talk about 'money being available' in that way since the financial equations are so complex is a different question.

I agree that we face real challenges now in creating a common sense of vision with a vote and nation so closely and yet greatly divided over things that really matter to us. I'm not seeing that kind of unifying visionary leadership from either side of the referendum debate - before the referendum or now - which risks leaving us in sore and damaging limbo. The only voice of leadership I've heard so far was Lord Digby Jones on Saturday morning on BBC.

All the best and thanks again for your thoughtful response. Nick

Rob

27/6/2016 05:45:16 pm

Nick, I can really relate to this. I'm interested to know what your concerns are with the current EU approach.

27/6/2016 10:04:06 pm

Thanks Rob. This is a summary of my concerns about EU strategy and policy. It's complex, based on years of working in international and organisational systems, but I'll give it a go:

EU expansion policy = EU gets bigger = more countries = more people.
Aims to ensure peace between nations by creating pan-European prosperity and community.
Bigger means feel part of something bigger, able to exert more collective power (inc economic) and influence in the world.
Flip side: bigger also means that, proportionately-speaking, each individual in EU feels smaller.
Smaller = less felt-sense of ability to influence = people feel disenfranchised.
Next: EU decision-making becomes more centralised to enable it to govern and exercise control over ever-expanding EU.
Flip side: more central control means less local control = people feel disenfranchised.
Local identity and democracy feel threatened. People don’t believe central EU bureaucracy sees or cares about them.
Next: nationalism offers a simple (simplistic) answer for people and nations who feel disenfranchised.
'Let's take back control' sounds like good news. Feels free-er, more local, more empowering.
So more and more people drawn to nationalism.
Next: EU 'open door' migrant policy, mixed with war/poverty and refugee issues.
Open door feels consistent with liberal democratic values. Models kind of countries we want to be.
Flip side: people in large numbers enter and move between countries from very different cultures.
Large numbers = less felt need to integrate into host cultures.
Some cultural values are in stark contrast to those of liberal democracies. Authorities ignore cultural issues because don’t want to appear racist or marginalise newcomers.
Next: rise of Islamic extremism. Terror attacks in EU countries. People are afraid.
People say they are worried about all this, where it might lead. They are silenced, told they are racist, xenophobic. Dangerous = people feel disenfranchised, unheard.
EU and governments try to calm migration tensions by hiding, covering up or minimalizing cultural tensions or misdemeanours.
Positive contributions of migrants and refugees get overshadowed by growing concerns, especially among people who feel most marginalised.
People see EU and governments as siding and colluding with migrants and marginalising own people = people feel disenfranchised.
People feel increasingly angry and unheard, esp those who feel most directly affected by migration.
World feels increasingly uncertain. People feel marginalised, insecure, unsafe.
Next: only place some disenfranchised people feel heard and understood is with the far right. Dangerous.
Far right offers simple (simplistic) solution that makes people feel safe again.
Separates ‘us’ from ‘them’, strengthens sense of belonging to ‘us’, portrays ‘us’ as good and ‘them’ as bad. Fulfills emotional need to belong.
Offers sense of purpose in the world: for ‘us’ and against ‘them’. Makes disenfranchised feel powerful.
Result: dramatic rise of far right nationalism across EU. Risk of war.

Alex Swarbrick

8/10/2020 03:36:47 pm

Nick, it looks like you and I were inspired by similar factors. I too think of myself as “..pro-European and pro-International; pro-refugee and pro-migration; pro-democracy and pro-human rights.” I too “feel desperately concerned about rising nationalism across the EU and beyond…” and for all those reasons felt I had to vote ‘remain’.

I love life’s paradoxes.

For me, it was far from a straight road to the ballot box. It probably began about 1965. Grew up in the North West, and my parents were committedly left wing in their politics, (despite having accounts at both Fortnum and Masons, and Harrods!). Passionate internationalists yet staunchly ‘anti Common Market’, in the 60s they organised anti-Common Market events with international guest speakers like Russel Braddon. Yet more paradoxes! A very little me, even went out with them door to door distributing flyers.

Dad’s logic went like this. He’d spent years in the Merchant Navy sailing too and from Australia and New Zealand, taking British manufactured goods one way, and returning with agricultural produce. His view was that if we joined the Common Market, that would herald the end of trade with the Commonwealth, if not the end of the Commonwealth itself. And if Britain was no longer trading with the Commonwealth but just trading across the North Sea, we wouldn’t need a Merchant Navy. With no Merchant Navy, we wouldn’t need shipbuilding and ship repair. And without those industries there’d be less demand for steel, which would mean reduced demand for coal. So, following that logic, joining the Common Market equated to signing the death warrant for British industry, particularly in the North of England.

All of that indeed came to pass, though perhaps for other reasons too.

So that was the landscape against which my Brexit vote decision-making took shape.

As passionate internationalists, Mum and Dad introduced my sister and me to as much of the world as was possible through family holidays. They drove from Blackpool to Austria in the 1950s in a Morris Minor for their honeymoon, and one of my earliest family holiday memories was in the mid-60s, driving to Malta – through France, Germany, Switzerland, Italy, Sicily, and then by ferry to Malta. Three weeks of history, culture education and sun! Later, their vocal opposition to apartheid in South Africa paved the way for my own participation in student anti-apartheid protests.

Fast forward to 2016. By that point I’d lived in Japan, Nepal and was living in Singapore. I’d run leadership development programmes in 20 countries worldwide. And I was watching a rising tide of hostility towards migrants in the UK, Europe, the US and elsewhere. The UK government’s stance towards migrants seemed to wobble unsympathetically between indifference and hostility.

Enter stage right – Nigel Farage, peddling anti-European untruths, anti-immigrant hatred, fanning latent anti-foreigner sentiments among struggling sectors of UK society, and that tide began to rise. I also nervously watched a growing blame of ‘them’ for the economic and social ills facing many parts of Europe. It all sounded a chillingly similar narrative to that which gained popularity in Germany in the 30s.

So, how to vote?
I’d read Gavin Hewitt’s (Former BBC Europe editor) book “The Lost Continent: Europe's Darkest Hour Since World War Two”, exploring the demise of the ‘European project’, largely as a result of ill-advised mechanisms and policies aimed at contriving greater unity across the bloc, much of which paradoxically fuelled separatist aspirations (e.g. the threat of Grexit at the time). To me, it seemed clear that while the vision of the ‘European project’ was a noble one (peace, unity, collaboration) the means to that end was broken and needed fixing.

Was the answer therefore to leave? Not in my head it wasn’t.

In a world which has never been so interconnected and interdependent, yet simultaneously witnessing an unprecedented rise of isolationism and nationalism, to me the solution was stay, and fight tooth and nail to fix it. To my mind, leaving Europe at this point was analogous to a disaffected teenager, living in a terraced house, fed up with parental rules and restrictions, deciding not simply to leave home, but to blow up the house on the way out, destroying their own home and taking out the neighbours at the same time.

Well, it turned out that just 2 people out of every 100 across the UK tipped the vote the other way. I therefore still struggle with the bluster of Brexiteer politicians claiming to be acting on the ‘wishes of the British people’ when in truth Brexit represents the wishes of roughly 1 in 2 of the population.

So, where form here? Keep seeking to heal the wounds of division and misunderstanding. Keep resisting national

8/10/2020 05:25:27 pm

Hi Alex and thank you for presenting such a thoughtful, personal counter-perspective and counter-stance. It struck me how we have shared some similar life experiences, looked on the same complex scenarios with similar passions and concerns, and drawn different conclusions on what best do to in response.

That, for me, mirrors the complexities of the Brexit and EU debate a a whole...which still continues to this day. It's pretty impossible for any one person or group to see, understand and make sense of all dimensions of what's happening in the world, let alone in one country, as there are so many 'VUCA' dynamics at play.

One of the most fascinating - and alarming - narratives I've read since writing this blog is Douglas Murray's 'The Strange Death of Europe' (2017, updated 2018). Have you seen it? On the front cover, The Times describes it as 'tremendous and shattering', and that about sums it up. It resonates with much of what I've observed and reflected on in recent years too.

Thank you again for posing such a healthy and positive challenge to my own perspective and stance. Keep up the good thinking and the good work!

Nixit

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