‘My English is terrible,’ he said, despondently, in near-perfect English. ‘I feel like I’m going backwards rather than improving.’ This recent, brief conversation with an asylum-seeker student typified a phenomenon that leaders, coaches and trainers often encounter in people and groups. A German social worker friend describes it as: ‘Eine Frage der Wahrnehmung’, which is, translated, ‘A question of perception.’ It’s something about perspective, belief what we notice and how we construe it. In this vein, Dr. Terrence Maltbia commented astutely in a LinkedIn post this week that coaching and facilitation are ‘as much about mind-sets as skill-sets.’ This student (above) was far more competent, more skilful, than he realised. Yet his own assessment of his performance affected his confidence badly. This, in turn, affected his emotional state and what he believed himself capable of doing. The immediate coaching challenge was, therefore, to address his mind-set, not his language skills. I asked and gestured: ‘Imagine a box. The box contains everything you know in English. How big was the box when you arrived in the UK?’ He gestured the shape and size of a tiny box. ‘And now..?’ He gestured a significantly larger box. ‘And so..?’. A wide smile broke out on his face. He sat up straight and his voice became stronger as he spoke: more confident, able and hopeful. In that moment, his perspective had changed and everything had changed with it. Eine Frage der Wahrnehmung. Why is this important? A person’s performance at work can be regarded as a dynamic product of 4xCs: commitment, competence, confidence and credibility. Commitment: what we are willing to do; competence: what we are able to do; confidence: what we believe about ourselves; credibility: what others believe about us. In my experience, confidence is a critical recurring factor in enhancing or inhibiting a person’s effectiveness. So, I’m curious: how do you enable a change in perception?
44 Comments
Gabriella Kovacs ACC
17/1/2019 09:43:20 pm
As a language coach, using scaling can often support positive perception change, also many other tools. Asking clients to actively get feedback from their network on their target language as perceived by members of the network proves useful too.
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Nick Wright
17/1/2019 09:47:13 pm
Hi Gabriella. That sounds fascinating. Do you have any examples you could share here?
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Osvaldo Torres Cruz
17/1/2019 09:50:02 pm
Good point. Unfortunately some leaders are not interested enough in their followers' perception about the vision and mission of the company.
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Nick Wright
17/1/2019 09:52:39 pm
Thanks Osvaldo. Interesting point. I'm curious - why do you think they are not interested? Is that something about their own perception of what is most important (or not important) too?
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Martine Bolton
17/1/2019 11:57:51 pm
Great article Nick, as always 🙂. I like to ask questions such as "Is there another way of looking at this?"; "How might (XXXXXXX) perceive this situation?"; "How might past experience be influencing your perception?" and so on.
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Nick Wright
18/1/2019 12:01:48 am
Thanks Martine. :) 'How might X perceive this?' reminds me of the SOGI model - to invite a client to perceive (by imagination) e.g. a goal, situation, issue or relationship from the perspective of Society (or stakeholders); Organisation; Group (or team) and Individual (or other key individuals) - and to see what fresh insight that reveals.
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Richard M. Kiernicki
18/1/2019 12:03:05 am
...i'd like to add "ask better questions"...dig deeper...and listen...
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Nick Wright
18/1/2019 12:04:13 am
Hi Richard. Do you have any examples of 'better questions' you could share here...perhaps questions that clients have found most useful?
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Richard M. Kiernicki
18/1/2019 03:03:35 pm
...Hi Nick...sure...for example...many of my prospects/clients/advisors have a tendency to answer questions in a manner that identifies an opinion versus a fact or an objection...so instead of trying to "educate" I will ask " Why do you believe or think that way about...?...
Nick Wright
18/1/2019 03:08:06 pm
Thanks Richard. You may find this related short piece interesting..? http://www.nick-wright.com/blog/good-question
Sara J. Sanderson
18/1/2019 12:05:20 am
Everything is perception even who you think you are. When you recognise that your world changes!
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Nick Wright
18/1/2019 12:08:01 am
Hi Sara. That perspective resonates well with social constructionism. Are you familiar with it? It also resonates well with an insight from Tony Clark that I share here: http://www.nick-wright.com/blog/perception
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Rami Harb
18/1/2019 12:09:27 am
I was looking for this for a while now... excellent explanation ... and the 4Cs are the core of it.
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Nick Wright
18/1/2019 12:09:53 am
Hi Rami. Thank you for such encouraging feedback!
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Bob Larcher
18/1/2019 10:42:02 am
I’m a great fan of questions, Socrates’ (no less) reputation was built around his ability to ask questions
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Nick Wright
18/1/2019 10:52:59 am
Hi Bob. Thanks for such a detailed response! You reminded me of John Heron's '6 Category Intervention Analysis' that identifies different modes of intervention with a client or group, available to a leader, trainer, facilitator, mentor or coach etc: prescriptive; informative; confronting; cathartic; catalytic; supportive. Are you familiar with it?
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Bob Larcher
18/1/2019 12:40:48 pm
No, not familiar with "John Heron's '6 Category Intervention Analysis", at least not as far as I am aware.
Nick Wright
18/1/2019 12:42:42 pm
Hi Bob. Heron's book, 'Helping the Client' (2001) is worth a glance. It explains each of the intervention categories in turn and provides examples of what they could look (and feel) like and involve in practice.
Bob Larcher
19/1/2019 12:21:25 pm
This post might add some ideas: https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6492361694696738816
Nick Wright
19/1/2019 12:22:44 pm
Thanks Bob. It reminds me of cognitive-behavioural psychology.
Bob Larcher
19/1/2019 02:35:04 pm
Our thoughts clearly have an impact on our feelings and our behaviour.
Nick Wright
19/1/2019 02:35:53 pm
Hi Bob. As do our feelings and behaviour on our thoughts etc..!
Bob Larcher
19/1/2019 05:43:17 pm
Hence the notion of "vicious" and "virtuous" circles.
Nick Wright
19/1/2019 05:43:30 pm
Absolutely.
Matthew Harris
18/1/2019 10:55:08 am
Hi NIck,
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Nick Wright
18/1/2019 11:02:20 am
Thanks Matthew. What an intriguing story!! I love your evocative question at the end too. :) It opens up all kinds of interesting questions about social-psychological dimensions to health, wellbeing and healing.
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Matthew Harris
18/1/2019 12:43:56 pm
Thanks Nick, I'll check out your link... Have a good weekend.
Nick Wright
18/1/2019 12:44:16 pm
Thanks Matthew. You too!
Suze Gurmeseva Assoc CIPD
18/1/2019 11:02:56 am
Thank you for the article. I would love to see comments from change experts...
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Nick Wright
18/1/2019 11:03:44 am
Thanks Suze. I would love to hear your thoughts too..! :)
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Suze Gurmeseva Assoc CIPD
19/1/2019 12:17:06 pm
Nick, to be honest I was thinking hard about your ending question and thought the answer is not very straight forward. Depending on the situation I would say, some perspectives require more time than others. It also depends on the person that is in question. Some people might be quick to see the bigger picture and respond with changing or adjusting their attitudes towards the given situation. While others will be so set in their ways that would require a lot of time and effort.
Nick Wright
19/1/2019 12:17:47 pm
Hi Suze. You sound like a change expert to me..! :)
David Shaw
18/1/2019 11:05:19 am
Mindfulness helps. Depth Typology (looking at all eight function attitudes and not just the ego side) offers another path. I always know I'm contributing my best when I hear a client saying "I see this differently now". Patience also has a major place in this.
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Nick Wright
18/1/2019 11:06:28 am
Hi David. It sounds like you have some valuable knowledge in this area. Do you have any examples you could share from experience here to illustrate the models and approaches you mention?
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Kathrin
18/1/2019 04:06:44 pm
Jedes der 4 c's ist wichtig. Doch wenn ich kein Vertrauen in mich und mein Können habe, dann werde ich auch keinen Mut für neue Aufgaben haben. Ich nehme mich als unwichtig und schwach wahr. Den Mut bekomme ich dann, wenn mir Freunde oder Kollegen zeigen, dass ich meine Aufgaben gut mache. Ein nettes Wort oder eine Mut machende Geste sind kleine Dinge, die aber viel bewirken können. Bei mir, aber auch bei anderen, denen ich so zeigen kann, wie wertvoll ihre Arbeit ist. So wird unsere Wahrnehmung positiv verändert und Selbstbewusstsein gegeben.
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Nick Wright
18/1/2019 04:18:46 pm
Hallo Kathrin. Ich denke, Sie haben das schön ausgedrückt. Einige Sozialpsychologen glauben, dass wir nicht wissen, wer wir sind, bis wir uns selbst in den Augen anderer sehen, sei es Gott, Familie, Kollegen oder Freunde. Ich denke, das ist ein Grund, warum Ermutigung und konstruktives Feedback als Unterstützung - und Pflege - so wertvoll und wirkungsvoll sein können. Ich stimme zu, dass Mut oft mit Vertrauen zusammenhängt. Wenn mir das Vertrauen fehlt - sei es aus meinem Inneren oder aus dem Vertrauen, das andere mir anvertrauen -, wird es für mich viel schwieriger, den zukünftigen Herausforderungen und Möglichkeiten mit Mut und Hoffnung zu begegnen.
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Terrence E. Maltbia
18/1/2019 05:54:24 pm
Nick, thanks for sharing this recent post and enjoyed reading your blog and seeing yet another version of the 4 Cs, I've familiar with: (1) Clarity (of intent/expectation), (2) Conditions (attending to relevant context - enablers and barriers), (3) Competence (i.e., can do); and (4) Commitment (i.e., will do).
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Nick Wright
19/1/2019 12:26:04 pm
Hi Terrence. You're welcome. Thanks for your LinkedIn post and for sharing a useful variation of the 4xCs. Here's another variation that shares some commonalities with yours: http://www.nick-wright.com/paradigm-4c-dynamic-model.html
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David Head
21/1/2019 12:58:42 pm
Giving a broader perspective and alternative perceptions helps to shape and challenge a narrow perspective. Working on internal narrative and underlying beliefs comes next. Why do you perceive a, b, c to be true? where do you think this comes from? what are the implications of this view? Helping to modify or get rid of unhelpful, self fulfilling expectations will help to square the circle.
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Nick Wright
21/1/2019 01:03:44 pm
Hi David. Yes, and cultural narratives and beliefs if we are working with wider systems. We can also challenge fixed perceptions or beliefs by introducing or exposing the client to unexpected perspectives or paradigms, e.g. 'If that's what it would take to square the circle, what would it take, in this situation or relationship, to circle the square?' You may find this related short piece interesting? http://www.nick-wright.com/blog/disrupt
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Ian Henderson
16/2/2019 04:39:44 pm
Really useful insight on perception and its power Nick.
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Nick Wright
16/2/2019 04:40:19 pm
Thanks Ian - appreciated!
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Kelly Huckaby
9/3/2019 11:09:53 am
It is amazing how important confidence is! I had an employee that I remember being a rock star at her job, but she just didn't believe in herself and she didn't believe me when I told her she was great. It took a couple of years to finally get her to have the confidence she should have had all along. I chipped away at it every month during 1on1's asking her to self-evaluate and then hear feedback from others.
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Nick Wright
9/3/2019 11:11:24 am
Hi Kelly. Thanks for sharing such a great example from personal experience of the power of perception!
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Nick WrightI'm a psychological coach, trainer and OD consultant. Curious to discover how can I help you? Get in touch! Like what you read? Simply enter your email address below to receive regular blog updates!
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