‘Carpe diem: seize the day. Make your life extraordinary.’ (Dead Poets Society) I was once invited by Lilin, my inspiring Malaysian sister-in-law, to speak at a University of the 3rd Age (U3A) event, for people who are retired from formal employment and interested to explore new ideas, experiences and themes. She invited me, simply, to share something of my own life story. I wasn’t sure where to start or to end or what to include in-between. How to distil a lifetime of experiences into a 45-minutes window? And, more importantly, what would people in this particular group find interesting, stimulating or worthwhile? So I prayed, jotted down notes of what came to mind, and then shared what I found most meaningful. I hoped it wouldn’t sound too alien and that they would feel at least some sense of connection. At the end, I was astonished to see a queue of people forming to speak with me. Apart from polite thank-yous, person after person looked at me, some with tears in their eyes, and said something along the lines of, ‘I too felt that prompt, that calling, that you described here today. But I was too scared to follow it so I didn’t. And now I so wish I had.’ Some expanded their accounts of how they had chosen to live too safely, too comfortably, and how this had, over time, stifled their sense of curiosity, courage and faith. I tried to reassure them with Richard Bach's words: ‘A test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: if you’re alive, it isn’t.’ For many, however, I could still see that haunting look of spiritual and existential angst on their faces: ‘I was too scared then, and I’m still too scared. And now it’s all too late.’ The greatest risk is never to take a risk. The time to act is now.
28 Comments
Nick Brown
17/7/2023 10:47:04 am
You are so right Nick. I procrastinate. I procrastinate so much that I procrastinate about procrastinating! There are so many things I wanted to do and I didn't do them. How do I stop myself procrastinating and do something instead? Any ideas?
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Nick Wright
17/7/2023 10:51:45 am
Hi Nick. Thank you - and for such an honest personal response. In my experience, it's a common issue and a great question. I share some thoughts and ideas in a couple of short related blogs. Let me know what you think?
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Liz Watson
17/7/2023 11:15:52 am
"Life is what happens while you're deciding what to do with it."
Nick Wright
17/7/2023 11:18:48 am
Hi Liz. Yes, indeed. You reminded me of a similar sentiment used by John Lennon in one of his songs: 'Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.'
Nick Brown
17/7/2023 01:10:10 pm
Thanks Nick. I'll have a read of them, if I ever get around to it. ;)
Nick Wright
17/7/2023 01:10:59 pm
Hi Nick. - I thought you might say that! :)
Tim Neesom
17/7/2023 10:54:00 am
Hi Nick. Thanks for posting this. I've got Pink Floyd's Time running through my head now.
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Nick Wright
17/7/2023 01:02:30 pm
Hi Tim. Yes, that song has had a big influence in my life. The lyrics fit so well with the 'seize the day' imperative. For those who are unfamiliar with it:
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Emily Peterson
17/7/2023 11:03:30 am
Hey Nick. Dead Poets Society. I LOVE that film. Haven't seen it for years. Will look it up again now! Thanks for sharing.
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Nick Wright
17/7/2023 11:06:34 am
Hi Emily. You're welcome. Me too. Robin Williams' seize the day speech is so powerful. It had a very big impact on my thinking and practice as a youth worker, confirming a philosophy and approach that felt instinctively meaningful for me. (Interestingly, I showed the same film to some parents at that time, and they found RW's approach reckless and irresponsible!).
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Amanda Harris
17/7/2023 11:10:23 am
Hi Nick. I find this blog very scary. I could have been one of those people standing the queue to speak to you. I've wasted too much of my life on people and things that didn't matter. I'm glad you included those words from Richard Bach. Is that the same writer who wrote the book about a seagull?
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Nick Wright
17/7/2023 11:14:29 am
Hi Amanda. Thanks for such an honest personal response too. Yes, it's the same Richard Bach who wrote Jonathan Livingstone Seagull. That book had a huge impact in my life.
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Alison Masters
17/7/2023 11:31:36 am
What right do you have to tell other people how they should live their lives??
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Nick Wright
17/7/2023 11:35:16 am
Hi Alison. That’s a fair question. None whatsoever.
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Alison Masters
17/7/2023 11:46:24 am
So why did you make all those people feel guilty about their lives?
Nick Wright
17/7/2023 01:05:11 pm
Hi Alison. I guess when we hear a different life story to our own, it can prompt us to re-evaluate our own life story. I certainly wouldn't want anyone to leave feeling guilty. Exposure to difference can be an opportunity to think and do something new - if we want to. It's always a choice.
Suzi Emerson
17/7/2023 11:33:16 am
Hi Nick. You seem to live an interesting life. But don’t you have any regrets?
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Nick Wright
17/7/2023 11:38:28 am
Hi Suzi. Yes, I have lived a very privileged life. God is gracious. 🙏 Yes, I do have regrets - mostly over how I have handled people and relationships that I wish I had handled differently. I can’t change that past, but I can pray and strive to be a better person now.
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Pete Robson
17/7/2023 01:12:59 pm
OK Nick, I get what you're saying. I can change my life direction. But where to start? I'm confused.
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Nick Wright
17/7/2023 01:15:18 pm
Hi Pete. That's a great question. I was once invited to speak on that very theme at a conference. In case of interest and useful, here's a brief write up of what I shared there:
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Mandy Richardson
17/7/2023 01:21:35 pm
Hi Nick. Love your Richard Bach quote. It fills me with hope! I'm bored to tears with my job. I'm bored with my life. I can't seem to make a change. It feels like I'm drifting aimlessly. I don't know what to do. How can I know what my "mission" in life is? It sounds like your a Christian. That must give you a feeling of purpose in this life. I don't know God. Listening to you and reading your blogs, I wish I did.
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Nick Wright
17/7/2023 01:31:11 pm
Thanks Mandy. Yes, my sense of calling became crystal clear in the exact same moment that I met Jesus at age 21. It has never changed since. I know that, for some people, however, it can take a lifetime to discover that sense of calling, and often only by tracing how God has worked in our lives, in retrospect.
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Jill Walker
17/7/2023 02:01:39 pm
Nick, you sound like a very driven person. I'm not like that. I go to work, do my job, come home, walk the dogs, watch TV to wind down, then go to bed and sleep. I'm content with my life.
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Nick Wright
17/7/2023 02:09:10 pm
Hi Jill. I'm not sure I would use the word 'driven', but I am highly motivated by a sense of purpose in my life. This started in early childhood with a passion for animal welfare and animal rights. I sometimes wonder where this strong passion originated from. A strong sense of calling, of purpose, has permeated my entire life since. It became 'purpose on steriods' when I met Jesus at 21!
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Philip Lace
17/7/2023 02:03:36 pm
Hi Nick. Do you believe "purpose" in life is something we find or something we create? Or both? As a life coach, I'm interested to hear what you think about this question.
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Nick Wright
17/7/2023 02:24:54 pm
Hi Philip. That's an interesting question. To be honest, I don't know. Sometimes a sense of purpose feels innate, as if it's an intrinsic part of who we are. Sometimes, we discover it when we encounter a situation that seems to call for or evoke something within us to act. Sometimes we choose or create it, perhaps with the support of something like spiritual-existential coaching, values-based coaching or vision/goal-orientated coaching. What do you think?
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Philip Lace
17/7/2023 04:25:12 pm
Thank you, Nick. Very interesting. I've never heard of "existential coaching". Can you suggest where I can find out more about it? It sounds fascinating.
Nick Wright
17/7/2023 04:31:12 pm
Hi Philip. You're welcome. For an introductory glance, you may find this short piece interesting and useful: https://www.nick-wright.com/blog/existential-coaching Leave a Reply. |
Nick WrightI'm a psychological coach, trainer and OD consultant. Curious to discover how can I help you? Get in touch! Like what you read? Simply enter your email address below to receive regular blog updates!
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